Чистый nonsense

‘Beneath these high Cathedral stairs
Lie the remains of Susan Pares.
Her name was Wiggs, it was not Pares,
But Pares was put to rhyme with stairs.’

Эпитафия

«В соборе сем в тени ступеней
Почиет в мире Сьюзан Пеней.
Звалась при жизни Уиггз, не Пеней,
Но Пеней – рифма для ступеней».

The Youthful Cove

In medio Tutorissimus ibis. “Thou shalt walk in the midst of thy Tutors.”

ONCE on a time a youthful cove
     As was a cheery lad
Lived in a villa by the sea. —
     The cove was not so bad;

The dogs and cats, the cows and ass,
     The birds in cage or grove
The rabbits, hens, ducks, pony, pigs
     All loved that cheery lad.

Seven folks – one female and six male, —
     Seized on that youthful cove;
They said – ”To edjukate this chap
     Us seven it doth behove.”

The first his parrient was, – who taught
     The cove to read and ride,
Latin, and Grammarithemetic,
     And lots of things beside.

Says Pa, “I’ll spare no pains or time
     Your school hours so to cut,
And sqare and fit, that you will make
     No end of progress – but —,”

Says Mrs. Grey, – ”I’ll teach him French,
     Pour parler dans cette pays —
Je cris, qu’il parlera bien,
     Même comme un Francais – Mais – ”

Says Signor Gambinossi, – ”Si
     Progresso si farà,
Lo voglio insegnare qui,
     La lingua mia, – ma,” —

Says Mr. Grump, – ”Geology,
     And Mathetics stiff
I’ll teach the cove, who’s sure to go
     Ahead like blazes, – if – ”

Says James – ”I’ll teach him everyday
     My Nastics: now and then
To stand upon his ‘ed; and make
     His mussels harder, – when” —

Says Signor Bianchi, – ”Lascia far; —
     La musica da me,
Ben insegnata gli serà; —
     Farà progresso, – Se – ”

Says Edmund Lear – ”I’ll make him draw
     A Palace, or a hut,
Trees, mountains, rivers, cities, plains,
     And p’rapps to paint them – but – ”

So all these 7 joined hands and sang
     This chorus by the sea; —
“O! Ven his edjukation’s done,
     By! Vot a cove he’ll be!”

Юный недоросль

In medio Tutorissimus ibis.

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