Voices in a Haunted Room

You’ve seen them together. That is how it is with us. Preordained ... Fate ... Call it what you like. It is not often two people meet and know they are the only ones. That is us, Claudine, and it is no use trying to pretend.”

“I daresay this is your set piece with all the married women you seek to seduce.”

“I have never made that speech before. There is only one to whom it would apply.

Claudine, don’t go against what has to be. Face it. Accept it. And try to work out a solution from there.”

“You seem to be of the opinion that I am as depraved as you are.”

He bent back my head and kissed my throat. I wished that I did not feel so emotionally aroused. I ought to turn and run away. I knew I must, but he would not let me go; and if I were really truthful I had to admit that I did not want to.

“Jonathan,” I said quietly. “Please, please let me go.”

“No,” he said firmly. “You belong to me. You have been foolish. You must have known all the time that you should never have married David.”

“Stop!” I cried. “I love David. He is good and kind. He is everything I need.”

“You say that because you do not know what you need.”

“And you know, of course.”

“Of course.”

He slipped the bodice from my shoulders just as he had in the sewing room.

“No,” I cried. “No.”

But he had forced me back on the bed.

“You don’t want to go, Claudine,” he said. He took the pins from my hair and let it fall about my shoulders. I protested, weakly, I must admit, whispering-perhaps without conviction: “Let me go.”

I heard him laugh and I felt his hands on me. It was as though I were sinking into mists of pleasure; and I knew that I had never experienced anything like this before, and that I could not go now ... not even if he stood aside and allowed me to.

I forgot where I was ... in this haunted room, this room of strange voices. I forgot everything but that I wanted to be with Jonathan, and that I had never known such ecstasy and that I wanted it to go on for ever. Perhaps somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I knew I must come out of this madness and face the wicked thing I was doing; but I could not at that moment. I was swallowed up in my desire and my overwhelming emotions.

I don’t know how long I lived in that world of sensation when nothing outside it seemed of any importance. But the reckoning came ... and soon.

I wrenched myself free. I tried to arrange my disordered dress, my loose hair. I stared about me. This room ... this evil room! Were those voices a warning? Had I been told by some supernatural force that this room could be the scene of my shame?

I put my hands over my face and began to weep quietly.

Jonathan put an arm about me. “Don’t, Claudine,” he said. “Be happy. It was wonderful, wasn’t it? Didn’t you know it would be? You and I. It was perfect. Some people are meant for each other. We are like that.”

“What have I done?”

He took my hands and kissed them. “Made me happy,” he said. “Made yourself happy.”

“David ... What of David?”

“He will not know.”

I stared at him in horror. “I must tell nun. I must confess what I have done. I must do so ... right away.”

“My dear, dear one, you are not being reasonable.”

“I have been so wicked.”

“No, no. You have behaved naturally. You must not feel this guilt.”

“Not feel guilty when I am guilty? Oh, how could you!”

“I did not force you, did I? You wanted to make love with me as much as I did with you.”

“If you had not come here. If you...”

“If you were not you and I were not myself, yes, things would have been so different.

Listen to me, Claudine. You are married to David. He is a good man. He would be bitterly hurt if he knew that you and I were in love with each other.”

“I tell you, I love him.”

“Yes ... but differently, eh? You love us both. Well, we are twins, are we not?

There must be a closeness between us. We started life together right from the beginning.

We were together before we were born. There must be a bond between us. You love us both and because we are twins it is almost as though you love the same man.”

“This doesn’t help at all.” I put my hands to my burning cheeks and started to pile up my hair. I was trembling, I could not bear to look into the future.

“Oh, why did you do this?” I cried. “Why did you send that message to Molly Blackett?”

“It had to be. I was seeking an opportunity. This seemed a good one.”

“I don’t think you have any scruples.”

“Oh yes I have. But I accept the inevitable. This had to be.”

“It must never happen again.”

He stood beside me and kissed me gently. “It is our secret,” he said. “No one need ever know.”

“I must tell David.”

“If you do you will ruin his happiness.”

“What a pity you did not think of that before!”

“Before, I could think of only one thing. Listen to me, Claudine. This has happened. It had to happen at some time. Perhaps it ill happen again.”

“Never,” I cried vehemently. “It must never.”