The Mousetrap

All right—you won’t. I’ll get the killer—I’ve no doubt of that—but it may be too late for one of you. (He moves up to Centre of the refectory table.) And I’ll tell you another thing. The killer’s enjoying this. Yes, he’s enjoying himself a good deal . . .

(There is a pause.)

(He moves round the Right end of the refectory table to behind it. He opens the Right curtain, looks out and then sits at the Right end of the window-seat) All right—you can go.

(MAJOR METCALF exits into the dining room down Right. CHRISTOPHER exits up the stairs Left. MISS CASEWELL crosses to the fire and leans on the mantelpiece. GILES moves Centre and MOLLIE follows; GILES stops and turns Right. MOLLIE turns her back on him and moves behind the armchair Centre. PARAVICINI rises and moves to Right of MOLLIE.)

PARAVICINI. Talking of chicken, dear lady, have you ever tried chickens’ livers served on toast that has been thickly smeared with foie gras, with a very thin rasher of bacon just touched with a soupçon of fresh mustard? I will come with you to the kitchen and we will see what we can concoct together. A charming occupation.

(PARAVICINI takes MOLLIE’s right arm and starts to move up Right.)

GILES. (TakingMOLLIE’s left arm) I’m helping my wife, Paravicini.

(MOLLIE throws off GILES’s arm.)

PARAVICINI. Your husband is afraid for you. Quite natural under the circumstances. He doesn’t fancy your being alone with me.

(MOLLIE throws off PARAVICINI’s arm.)

It is my sadistic tendencies he fears—not my dishonourable ones. (He leers.) Alas, what an inconvenience the husband always is. (He kisses her fingers.) Arrivederlà . . .

MOLLIE. I’m sure Giles doesn’t think . . .

PARAVICINI. He is very wise. Take no chances. (He moves down to Right of the armchair centre.) Can I prove to you or to him or to our dogged Sergeant that I am not a homicidal maniac? So difficult to prove a negative. And suppose that instead I am really . . . (He hums the tune of “Three Blind Mice.”)

MOLLIE. Oh, don’t. (She moves to the back of the armchair Centre.)

PARAVICINI. But such a gay little tune? Don’t you think? She cut off their tails with a carving knife—snick, snick, snick—delicious. Just what a child would adore. Cruel little things, children. (Leaning forward) Some of them never grow up.

(MOLLIE gives a frightened cry.)

GILES. (Moving to Right of the refectory table) Stop frightening my wife at once.

MOLLIE. It’s silly of me. But you see—I found her. Her face was all purple. I can’t forget it . . .

PARAVICINI. I know. It’s difficult to forget things, isn’t it? You aren’t really the forgetting kind.

MOLLIE. (Incoherently) I must go—the food—dinner—prepare the spinach—and the potatoes all going to pieces—please, Giles.

(GILES and MOLLIE exit through the archway up Right. PARAVICINI leans on the Left side of the arch and looks after them, grinning. MISS CASEWELL stands by the fireplace, lost in thought.)

TROTTER. (Rising and crossing to Left ofPARAVICINI) What did you say to the lady to upset her, sir?

PARAVICINI. Me, Sergeant? Oh, just a little innocent fun. I’ve always been fond of a little joke.

TROTTER. There’s nice fun—and there’s fun that’s not so nice.

PARAVICINI. (Moving down Centre) Now I do wonder what you mean by that, Sergeant?

TROTTER. I’ve been doing a little wondering about you, sir.

PARAVICINI. Indeed?

TROTTER. I’ve been wondering about that car of yours, and how it happened to overturn in a snowdrift (He pauses and draws the Right curtain.) so conveniently.

PARAVICINI. Inconveniently, you mean, don’t you, Sergeant?