AK 239: The Enemy Is Already Here

The sailor then helps out a much older and slower Admiral Perchinkov who looks to have aged 20 years.

He doesn’t look happy but if you lived in temperatures like this, you likely wouldn’t be happy either!

More sailors emerge and toss a plank across so Perchinkov can walk directly onto TK-20.

Admiral Perchinkov says, “You know, Vasili, we have five submarines watching you.”

Vasili says, “Five? The Americans said it was six, not counting us. And “we” want you to know we have nine watching you.”

A new Cold War standoff has begun.

Right here!

Right now!

As the two, old steely Russians stare down each other with contempt, Admiral Baker opens his mouth but before he can speak, I look at him as if, “I wouldn’t!”

I’ve heard the admiral does not like to take advise from anyone.

He wisely takes mine and decides against stepping into this private war between these two, old, Russian titans.

Vasili then says,

“I don’t want to see water any more. I found the people of Nebraska to be quite lovely."

Admiral Perchinkov shows Captain Vasili a picture of the Russian flag planted three miles beneath them on the seabed.

“See Vasili,” as a slight I notice Perchinkov refuses to use his title as captain,

“You’ve made one huge mistake. Where we’re standing and, as for as far as you can see, in any direction is a Russian gold mine."

Vasili responds,

“Your president is very good at weaponizing information but he’s not so good with the truth. Just because you plant a flag somewhere doesn’t make the place yours. The Arctic belongs to all of us. Ever see corn and wheat waving in a Nebraska summer breeze? I have. Come visit me sometime, comrade!”

Everyone watches this stout Russian admiral, as his neck slowly turns red. His blood rises somewhere above eye level. If his blood pressure gets any higher it just might blow his head clean off!

Further, if Perchinkov had a weapon it looks like he would kill Vasili! Right here and right now.

Vasili gives him a stoic Russian salute then motions for his wife to walk to him. Perchinkov does not return the salute.

We all feel the weight of a thousand years of Russian history transpire as Vasili’s wife walks to him. Vasili won’t ever again look at Perchinkov. Vasili grabs his wife and hugs her.

After eternity passes of Perchinkov staring at this horrid sight, he turns and walks to his front hatch and enters “his” sub.

A twenty-one-year-old, hulky sailor leans over to me and asks: “What just happened?”

I say: “It would take a thousand years to explain, son, at least a thousand!”

Russian sailors look around confused as to what is happening next.

I worriedly ask, “Ya think Perchinkov just might leave us out here while he submerges?”

Vasili ignores my worry and instead says to me, “So what will you do now commander?

I smile at the commander line again and then answer,

“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll start my own local chapter of the ASPCA.”

Vasili asks, “ASPCA. What is that?

I sarcastically answer,

“The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Acronyms!”

Vasili looks at me sincerely as he studies my game face then says,

“Was that good American joke?”

I sincerely ask, “I don’t know, was that good American joke?”

The captain is sincerely confused and does not know how to answer.

Admiral Baker steps in laughing and says,

“Hell ya!”

“That’s a great American joke.”

The admiral then mumbles to himself as he mumbles under his breath,

“ASPCA! Now that’s funny.”

I pull out my trusty Motorola SRX 2400 and say, “Okay, we’re gonna need a lift.”

If you thought the Russians were careless, here comes the USS Alaska.

She punches through and practically lands on top of TK-20. The conning tower is angled perfectly so that Vasili, and General Baker, and I can walk from the front hull of TK-20 right onto the conn!

On the USS Alaska conning tower former Lieutenant Commander Jennifer Tavana is the first person to appear. She is allowed to wear her Navy dress whites for the transfer too.

She looks a lot better than I.

“Well that explains it! A woman’s driving this thing!” I say.

Jen ignores my chivalrous attitude.

Jen holds out her hand for Vasili.

“Welcome aboard captain.”

Then she holds out her hand for me in a very “different” manner.

I grab it and step aboard. “Welcome aboard commander,” she says teasingly.

“Thank you but…”

Jen salutes me and I think:

What the hell!

I salute her back saying,

“Thank you Lieutenant Commander.”

Jen starts to say, “Former…” but the word doesn’t make it out as she looks to think:

What the hell, as well!

No sooner did we say that, then we quickly disappear beneath the ice.

Antigua, Caribbean

^{Beach Resort}

Bartender delivers drinks to a man and woman sunning themselves on a beach.

At first it looks a bit like Jen and me.

However, upon closer inspection the following was relayed to me:

A man, in designer sunglasses, pulls up a briefcase and pulls out a hundred and gives it to the waiter.

“Gracias, senior.”

It’s crazy Al and Tatiana, his Russian doctor girlfriend!