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“They’re not going to do any such thing,” said Marge. “They’re going to enjoy their honeymoon and they’re going to get along with their neighbors.” She turned to the camera and raised her voice. “How is the bed? Do you think you’ll be able to sleep tonight?”

“The bed is just the best, Mom,” said Chase. “One of those box-spring beds that are so comfortable to sleep on.”

“Sleep!” Gran scoffed. “Do you really expect them to sleep on their honeymoon?” She gave her granddaughter a wink. “Plenty of nookie—that’s what honeymoons are for!”

Odelia’s face flushed a little, and even Chase looked slightly embarrassed.

“How are Max and Dooley?” asked Marge after a pause. “Are they settling in all right?”

“I’ll let them tell you themselves,” said Odelia, and turned her phone to me.

“I’m fine, Marge!” I said, probably a little too loud. I wasn’t used to skyping. It felt a little odd to be talking like this, especially since there was an obvious lag.

“Oh, good,” said Marge. “And remember, Max, if you get lost just head to the bow of the ship and wait for Odelia to come and find you.”

“The bow?” said Gran. “I thought we said the stern?”

“No, the bow. Don’t try to find the cabin, Max. On a big boat like that it’s easy to get lost, so you do what we tell you, all right?”

“I think we said the stern, or aft.”

“No, the bow. Just like Kate and Leo.”

“Oh, right, and then Max can sing about his heart that goes on and on.”

“He doesn’t have to sing, Ma. All he has to do is sit there and wait.”

“Or he can sit and wait and sing.”

“He won’t have to sit and wait and sing,” said Tex. “Max is a clever cat. He won’t get lost. Will you, Max?”

“I won’t get lost,” I said with an indulgent smile.

“He says he won’t get lost,” said Marge.

“Yeah, I figured that was what he said, honey.”

They’d given Dooley and me this safety briefing three times already. Not that I thought we’d need it. I had absolutely no intention of wandering off on my own. In fact if it was up to me I’d stay in the cabin the whole time, but Odelia would have none of that.

“We met a teacup dog today, Marge,” said Dooley. “He’s not small enough to fit inside a teacup, though, so I don’t really know why he would call himself a teacup dog, but he was very nice. He told us all about his humans.”

Gran grinned.“Of course you would start collecting shipboard gossip the moment you set paw on the boat. You’re my kind of cat, Dooley!”

“That’s because I am your cat, Gran!” Dooley yelled.

“What’s with the yelling?” she yelled. “I’m not deaf, you silly cat!”

“What are your plans for tonight?” asked Marge. “Party time?”

“No, I think we’ll turn in early,” said Odelia.

“Youth really is wasted on the young,” said Gran. “If I were in your shoes I’d party all night, every night. In fact Scarlett and I are planning to take the same trip next year. So you make sure you take plenty of pictures, you hear? I want to know everything.”

“You’re going on a cruise, Gran?” asked Chase.

“Oh, sure. Can’t wait, in fact.”

“Let’s first try to get our house rebuilt,” said Tex, “and then we’ll see about a cruise.”

“Killjoy,” Gran muttered.

“You guys have a great time,” said Marge. I was already turning away, figuring our Skype session was over, but then she said, “Max and Dooley, I have a little surprise for you. Come over here, will you?”

So we came over there, and lo and behold: Harriet and Brutus moved into view. Harriet was frowning, and the first thing she said was:“Why didn’t you take us along on your cruise? It’s not fair!”

9

“I knew I should have insisted,” said Harriet. “Now you’re having the time of your lives while we’re stuck here at home—bored out of our skulls with nothing to do!”

“I thought you started going back to cat choir?” I asked.

“Cat choir is fine, but it’s got nothing on a Caribbean cruise, Max.”

“Look, next time it will be our turn,” said Brutus. “Gran has already been making plans with Scarlett, and I’m sure she’ll take us along.”

“Besides, there’s nothing to be jealous about,” I said. “We’re on a boat, Harriet, in the middle of the ocean. Not exactly the kind of position a cat likes to be in.”

“Yeah, and there’s a lot of people,” said Dooley. “And we have to be very careful that we don’t get trampled.”

“You’re just saying that to make me feel better,” said Harriet, though judging from her tone, which was already slightly less fractious, she was susceptible to our arguments.

“Look, to be absolutely honest I can’t wait until we’re back in Hampton Cove,” I said. I glanced in the direction of the balcony, where Odelia and Chase were enjoying the view. I didn’t want to sound ungrateful, but putting two cats on a boat wasn’t exactly the done thing. And neither was putting them on a plane, which were exactly the two things we’d had to endure to share this honeymoon with our humans.

“We met two birds today,” said Dooley. “They were very nice. Weren’t they, Max?”

“Very nice,” I agreed. “So how is everybody over there?”