The Hand You're Dealt

I began looking around the room. It was opulent; old Skye had obviously done well for himself. Suze was poking around, too. “Hey,” she said, after a moment. I turned to look at her. She was climbing up on the credenza. The blast had knocked a small piece of sculpture off the wall — it lay in two pieces on the floor — and she was examining where it had been affixed. “Thought that’s what it was,” she said, nodding. “There’s a hidden camera here.”

My heart skipped a beat. “You don’t suppose he got the whole thing on disk, do you?” I said, moving over to where she was. I gave her a hand getting down off the credenza, and we opened it up — a slightly difficult task; crusted blood had sealed its sliding doors. Inside was a dusty recorder unit. I turned to Skye’s desk, and pushed the release switch to pop up his monitor plate. Suze pushed the recorder’s playback button. As we’d suspected, the unit was designed to feed into the desk monitor.

The picture showed the reverse angle from behind Skye’s desk. The door to the private office opened and in came a young man. He looked to be eighteen, meaning he was just the right age for the mandatory adult soothsaying. He had shoulder length dirty-blond hair, and was wearing a t-shirt imprinted with the logo of a popular meed. I shook my head. There hadn’t been a good multimedia band since The Cassies, if you ask me.

“Hello, Dale,” said what must have been Skye’s voice. He spoke with deep, slightly nasal tones. “Thank you for coming in.”

Okay, we had the guy’s picture, and his first name, and the name of his favorite meed. Even if Dale’s last name didn’t turn up in Skye’s appointment computer, we should have no trouble tracking him down.

“As you know,” said Skye’s recorded voice, “the law requires two soothsayings in each person’s life. The first is done just after you’re born, with one or both of your parents in attendance. At that time, the soothsayer only tells them things they’ll need to know to get you through childhood. But when you turn eighteen, you, not your parents, become legally responsible for all your actions, and so it’s time you heard everything. Now, do you want the good news or the bad news first?”

Here it comes, I thought. He told Dale something he didn’t want to hear, the guy flipped, pulled out a blaster, and blew him away.

Dale swallowed. “The — the good, I guess.”

“All right,” said Skye. “First, you’re a bright young man — not a genius, you understand, but brighter than average. Your IQ should run between 126 and 132. You are gifted musically — did your parents tell you that? Good. I hope they encouraged you.”

“They did,” said Dale, nodding. “I’ve had piano lessons since I was four.”

“Good, good. A crime to waste such raw talent. You also have a particular aptitude for mathematics. That’s often paired with musical ability, of course, so no surprises there. Your visual memory is slightly better than average, although your ability to do rote memorization is slightly worse. You would make a good long-distance runner, but…”

I motioned for Suze to hit the fast-forward button; it seemed like a typical soothsaying, although I’d review it in depth later, if need be. Poor Dale fidgeted up and down in quadruple speed for a time, then Suze released the button.

“Now,” said Skye’s voice, “the bad news.” I made an impressed face at Suze; she’d stopped speeding along at precisely the right moment. “I’m afraid there’s a lot of it. Nothing devastating, but still lots of little things. You will begin to lose your hair around your twenty-seventh birthday, and it will begin to gray by the time you’re thirty-two. By the age of forty, you will be almost completely bald, and what’s left at that point will be half brown and half gray.

“On a less frivolous note, you’ll also be prone to gaining weight, starting at about age thirty-three — and you’ll put on half a kilo a year for each of the following thirty years if you’re not careful; by the time you’re in your mid-fifties, that will pose a significant health hazard. You’re also highly likely to develop adult-onset diabetes. Now, yes, that can be cured, but the cure is expensive, and you’ll have to pay for it — so either keep your weight down, which will help stave off its onset, or start saving now for the operation…”

I shrugged. Nothing worth killing a man over. Suze fast-forwarded the tape some more.

“—and that’s it,” concluded Skye. “You know now everything significant that’s coded into your DNA. Use this information wisely, and you should have a long, happy, healthy life.”