The First Councel

Bent over, I’m still struggling to digest what’s running through my head. That’s why she brought me to see him. They gave me the list of suspects; I took it as fact. Without Vaughn, I never would’ve questioned it. There’s only one problem with the picture-it’s all coming together a bit too easily. From the box being up here, to the file being in its exact place… I can’t put my finger on it, but it feels a little too force-fed. It’s almost as if someone’s trying to help me. As if they want to be found out.

“I never meant to hurt you, Michael,” a voice whispers behind me.

I spin around, recognizing it immediately. Nora. “Is that the lie of the moment? Some maudlin disclaimer?”

She walks toward me. “I wouldn’t lie to you,” she says. “Not anymore.”

“Not anymore? That’s supposed to make me feel better? The first fifty things you told me were bullshit, but from here on in, it’s all sunshine?”

“It wasn’t bullshit.”

“It was, Nora! All of it was!”

“That’s not-”

“Stop lying!”

“Why’re you-”

“Why’m I what? Shattered? Enraged? Devastated? Why do you think, Nora!? That night we outran the Service, you weren’t lost! You knew where that bar was, and you knew Simon’d be waiting inside for the drop point!”

“I wasn’t-”

“You knew, Nora. You knew. After that, all you had to do was sit back and watch it play out. I follow; you leave the ten grand in my car; the next day, once Caroline’s dead, you’ve got an instant scapegoat.”

“Michael… ”

“You’re not even denying it! Trey was right, wasn’t he? That’s why you took the money-to plant on me! That’s all you had to do!”

For once, she decides not to fight back.

I take a second, catching my breath. “Must’ve been a real monkey-wrench when we got pulled over by the cops. You may’ve lost the Service, but now you had a witness.”

“It was more than that,” she whispers.

“Oh, that’s right-when I said the money was mine, it was also the first time anyone was ever nice to you. How’d you put it that night? People don’t do nice things for you? Well, no offense, Sybil, but I finally understand why.”

“You don’t mean that,” she says, putting a hand on my shoulder.

“Get the hell off me!” I shout, pulling away. “Dammit, Nora, don’t you get it? I was on your side! I looked past the drugs; I ignored every rumor. I took you to see my father, for chrissakes! I loved you, Nora! Do you have any idea what that means?” I can’t help it-I start choking up.

She looks at me with the saddest eyes I’ve ever seen. “I love you too.”

I shake my head. Too little. Too late. “Are you at least gonna tell me why?”

All I get is silence.

“I asked you a question, Nora. Why’d you do it?” My shoulders are shaking. “Tell me! Are you in love with him?”

“No!” Her voice cracks with that one.

“Then why’re you sleeping with him?”

“Michael… ”

“Don’t Michael me! Just give me an answer!”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“It’s sex, Nora! There are only so many reasons to do it-you’re in love… ”

“It’s more complicated th-”

“… you’re horny… ”

“This isn’t about you.”

“… you’re desperate… ”

“Stop it, Michael.”

“… you’re bored… ”

“I said stop it!”

“… or it’s against your will.”

Nora falls dead silent.

Oh, God.

Crossing her arms, she wraps them around her torso and tucks her chin toward her chest.

“Did he… ”

She raises her eyes just enough for me to see the first tears. They stream down her face and slowly trickle down her thin neck.

“He molested you?”

She turns away.

A sharp fire rips a hole in my stomach. I’m not sure if it’s rage or pain. All I know is it hurts. “When did it happen?” I ask.

“You don’t underst-”

“Was it more than once?”

“Please, Michael, please don’t do this,” she begs.

“No,” I tell her. “You need this.”

“It’s not what you think-it’s only since-”

“Only!? How long has it been going on?”

Once again, dead silence. A piece of wood creaks in the corner. She keeps her eyes locked on the floor. Her voice is tiny. “Since I was eleven.”

“Eleven?” I cry. “Oh, Nora… ”

“Please-please don’t tell anyone!” she begs. “Please, Michael!” Floodgates open. The tears come fast. “I… I have to… I don’t have money!”

“What do you mean you don’t have money?”

She’s breathing heavily-panting through her sobs. “For the drugs!” she sobs. “It’s just the drugs!”

As she says the words, I feel the blood drain from my face. That sick dominating bastard. He keeps her trapped by drugs in exchange for-

“Please, Michael, promise you won’t say anything! Please!”

I can’t stand hearing her beg. Sobbing uncontrollably, with her arms still wrapped around herself, she just stands there-in her self-made cocoon-afraid to reach out.

Since the day we met, I’ve seen a side of Nora Hartson that she’d never reveal to the public. As a friend and a liar, a lunatic and a lover. As a bored rich kid, a fear-nothing thrill-seeker, an odds-defying gambler, and even, for the briefest of moments, as a perfect daughter-in-law. I’ve seen her everywhere in between. But never as a victim.