The Black Swan

“I will,” he said, and looked relieved.

I felt a little hurt, and that my call had been unwelcome.

It was very strange. In the past they had always been so friendly. They had behaved as though I were a member of the family. Of course, that friendship had been with my father; but whenever we had visited I always felt very welcome; and in view of my relationship with Joel I really did feel very close. I was a little subdued and surprised that now I felt like a stranger intruding on their grief, which surely they knew was mine also.

I was pensive as I drove home. Then I began to realize that seeing me must have brought back the tragedy more vividly.

I mentioned this to Celeste.

She replied, “You noticed it too. I did not see Lady Greenham either. I was told that she was not well and was resting in her room. But Sir John... well, he hardly seemed overjoyed to see me.”

“I can understand it in a way. They were so friendly with my father and first he went... and now Joel. We must try to realize how they must be feeling. They don’t want to see anyone who reminds them. I had the feeling that I did not know the whole truth.”

 “What was there to know? He went out there full of promise and he came to this dreadful end. It’s a bitter tragedy for his parents.”

“Yes, I understand their feelings. But I hoped to hear something. Now it is left at Joel’s just going over there and then... disappearing.”

“Well, that is what happened. I think, Lucie, you will have to try to forget Joel. We both have to shut off the past. We’ve got to look ahead. Now those very nice people you met ... I think we could be really good friends. The girl is amusing and he is rather serious... but I like him for that.”

“I am glad you like them. I do, too.”

“Well, we’ll see how this dinner goes.”

It went extremely well; and after that the Fitzgeralds became frequent visitors to the house. They took us out to dine. Their pied-à-terre was not suitable for entertaining, they said.

Our pleasant friendship was developing fast.

To my great joy, Rebecca paid us a visit.

As soon as she had received my letter she had prepared to come to London. I could talk to her as I could to no one else, and I was soon confiding to her what had happened with Jean Pascal.

Her face darkened as she listened.

“Oh, you did well to leave, Lucie. It was absolutely the right thing and how lucky that those nice people were leaving at the same time.”

“I don’t think they planned to do so actually. They just put their return about a week forward so that they would travel with me.”

“Then I like them the more.”

“You’ll be meeting them soon. They have become great friends. Celeste, I am glad to say, likes them very much and so will you. I wrote to you at the chateau but I did not post the letter. I was asking you to come there and then of course I saw the Fitzgeralds the next day and realized I could leave with them.”

When I told her how Jean Pascal had tried to come into my bedroom, her face darkened. “How glad I am your door was locked! He is a man to avoid. I was quite worried when I heard you were going to France with him. I did think, though, that his main interest was in Belinda.”

“So did 1.1 think he is proud of his daughter. She is like him in lots of ways and she is, of course, very attractive.”

“And he really asked you to marry him!”

“I was astonished. Of course, he had been very considerate toward me all the time... and then that happened and I just wanted to run away.” She nodded. Then she said slowly, “A thought has occurred to me, Lucie. You could now be called a rich young woman, I suppose.”

“You think it was that ...”

“He is what he would call a realist. He was once going to marry a girl with royal connections... but that sort of thing has gone out of fashion in France. I always thought that was why the marriage was delayed and later abandoned. It may be that now he is ready to settle for a fortune. On the other hand, you are young and he would find youth very appealing at his time of life.”

“He said that he was in love with me.”

“He falls in love as naturally as he breathes. It doesn’t mean much more to him than the fancy of the moment. But to propose marriage... well, I don’t like it, Lucie. I can’t tell you how relieved I am that you had the good sense not to be fascinated by him.”

“I was repulsed.”

“I know. So was I. He made suggestions to me once. Oh no ... not marriage. He had the temerity and insolence to suggest that he could initiate me into the art of being more seductive to my husband. I was furious with him. And then... it was in High Tor ... he tried to rape me. It was to give me a taste of the irresistible pleasures which he could provide and which I was too stupid and unsophisticated, in his opinion, to know anything about.”

“How arrogant! He can be courteous and behave sometimes with such a sense of chivalry outwardly while he plans those things. He reminds me of the swan.”

“Swan?”