The pyramid gave a new meaning to the word ‘massive’. It bent the landscape around it. It seemed to Teppic that its very weight was deforming the shape of things, stretching the kingdom like a lead ball on a rubber sheet.{31}
He knew that was a ridiculous idea. Big though the pyramid was, it was tiny compared to, say, a mountain.
But big, very big, compared to anything else. Anyway, mountains were
It was also very cold. The black marble of its sides was shining white with frost in the roasting afternoon sun. He was foolish enough to touch it and left a layer of skin on the surface.
‘It’s freezing!’
‘It’s storing already, O breath of the river,’ said Ptaclusp, who was sweating. ‘It’s the wossname, the boundary effect.’
‘I note that you have ceased work on the burial chambers,’ said Dios.
‘The men … the temperature … boundary effects … a bit too much to risk …’ muttered Ptaclusp. ‘Er.’
Teppic looked from one to the other.
‘What’s the matter?’ he said. ‘Are there problems?’
‘Er,’ said Ptaclusp.
‘You’re way ahead of schedule. Marvellous work,’ said Teppic. ‘You’ve put a tremendous amount of labour on the job.’
‘Er. Yes. Only.’
There was silence except for the distant sounds of men at work, and the faint noise of the air sizzling where it touched the pyramid.
‘It’s bound to be all right when we get the capstone on,’ the pyramid builder managed eventually. ‘Once it’s flaring properly, no problem. Er.’
He indicated the electrum capstone. It was surprisingly small, only a foot or so across, and rested on a couple of trestles.
‘We should be able to put in on tomorrow,’ said Ptaclusp. ‘Would your sire still be honouring us with the capping-out ceremony?’ In his nervousness he gripped the hem of his robe and began to twist it. ‘There’s drinks,’ he stuttered. ‘And a silver trowel that you can take away with you. Everyone shouts hurrah and throws their hats in the air.’
‘Certainly,’ said Dios. ‘It will be an honour.’
‘And for us too, your sire,’ said Ptaclusp loyally.
‘I
‘And you can get rid of that,’ he added.
Ptaclusp gave him a look of unhappy innocence.
‘That statue,’ said Dios, ‘is what I am referring to.’
‘Oh. Ah. Well, we thought once you saw it in place, you see, in the right light, and what with Hat the Vulture-Headed God being very—’
‘It goes,’ said Dios.
‘Right you are, your reverence,’ said Ptaclusp miserably. It was, right now, the least of his problems, but on top of everything else he was beginning to think that the statue was following him around.
Dios leaned closer.
‘You haven’t seen a young woman anywhere on the site, have you?’ he demanded.
‘No women on the site, my lord,’ said Ptaclusp. ‘Very bad luck.’
‘This one was provocatively dressed,’ the high priest said.
‘No, no women.’
‘The palace is not far, you see. There must be many places to hide over here,’ Dios continued, insistently.
Ptaclusp swallowed. He knew that, all right. Whatever had possessed him …
‘I assure you, your reverence,’ he said.
Dios gave him a scowl, and then turned to where Teppic, as it turned out, had been.
‘Please ask him not to shake hands with anybody,’ said the builder, as Dios hurried after the distant glint of sunlight on gold. The king still didn’t seem to be able to get alongside the idea that the last thing the people wanted was a man of the people. Those workers who couldn’t get out of the way in time were thrusting their hands behind their back.
Alone now, Ptaclusp fanned himself and staggered into the shade of his tent.
Where, waiting to see him, were Ptaclusp IIa, Ptaclusp IIa, Ptaclusp IIa and Ptaclusp IIa. Ptaclusp always felt uneasy in the presence of accountants, and four of them together was very bad, especially when they were all the same person. Three Ptaclusp IIbs were there as well; the other two, unless it was three by now, were out on the site.
He waved his hands in a conciliatory way.
‘All right, all right,’ he said. ‘What’s today’s problems?’
One of the IIas pulled a stack of wax tablets towards him.
‘Have you any idea, father,’ he began, employing that thin, razor-edged voice that accountants use to preface something unexpected and very expensive, ‘what calculus is?’
‘You tell me,’ said Ptaclusp, sagging on to a stool.
‘It’s what I’ve had to invent to deal with the wages bill, father,’ said another IIa.
‘I thought that was algebra?’ said Ptaclusp.
‘We passed algebra last week,’ said a third IIa. ‘It’s calculus now. I’ve had to loop myself another four times to work on it, and there’s three of me working on—’ he glanced at his brothers — ‘quantum accountancy.’
‘What’s that for?’ said his father wearily.