Lament for a lost lover

She was silent for a moment, then she said, “Oh, I know you think that I’m rather stupid ...”

“Of course I don’t.”

“You don’t have to pretend. Most people do. Well, perhaps not stupid, but not very bright and not attractive ... not like you and Harriet, for instance.”

“You’re imagining this.”

“I don’t think I am. But I’m not stupid. There are things I see which some people miss. You, for instance ...”

“Why don’t you tell me what you came to say, Charlotte?”

“I’m trying to. It’s not easy. I don’t forget how you saved me once ...”

“Oh, that’s long ago.”

“I’ve always remembered. Sometimes I wonder whether I should have done it. People think they will leave this world and then at the last minute they’re afraid. I just thought there wasn’t anything to live for. They had made so much fuss about Charles Condey ... having that house party, talking of making the announcement ... I just didn’t think I could face it.”

“I understand that.”

“Harriet is evil, Arabella. Do you know that? Oh, I’m not sure about witchcraft. But I do know she is evil. She wantonly broke up my life ... now she will do the same to you. She already did it once, didn’t she? I knew how it was with her and Edwin. I knew right at the start. I daresay you’ll despise me, but I listen at doors. I pry and peep and find out things. It’s mean and underhand but it compensates me in a way. I don’t have much life of my own so I live other people’s. I know more than they do, because I listen and peep and that justifies me in a way because I’m not bright and attractive. Do you understand?”

“Of course I do. But, Charlotte ...”

She waved her hand. “Listen. She married Uncle Toby, didn’t she, because she wanted to come here and she wanted his name and title because she was determined he should get it. You don’t think Benjie is Uncle Toby’s son, do you?”

“Whose? “I asked.

“Are you so innocent, Arabella?”

I felt myself flushing hotly. “Charlotte, you are talking nonsense.”

“No. She wanted a son who was a claimant. Benjie to follow on Edwin.”

“Are you suggesting that she would dare hurt Edwin? That’s nonsense.”

“Perhaps I have said too much. You would rather not hear.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Forgive me, Arabella. I wanted to repay you ... for saving my life once, but if you would be happier not a knowing ... if you would rather wait until doom overtakes you ?”

“Tell me what you know,” I said tersely.

“I know this. Edwin was her lover. He was shot when they were if in the arbour. At that time she was already carrying his child.

Leigh is not Charles Condey’s son.”

“I know,” I said.

“So she deceived you with Edwin. Then she ran away, leaving you to look after your husband’s bastard, and you did. Arabella, you are a good woman. It grieves me to see you treated thus. But you are blind ... sometimes I think wilfully blind. You really thought Benjie was Uncle Toby’s son. That was rather naive. Poor Uncle Toby, he had to die when she was pregnant”

“Are you suggesting she ... killed him.”

“In a comfortable, natural sort of way which could hardly be t. brought against her. It wasn’t difficult to excite the old gentleman. She knew he had already had his heart attack. Child’s play. She knew she would do it sooner or later. So natural, they said, r didn’t they, an ageing husband, a young exciting wife.”

“Oh, don’t, Charlotte.”

“I know you hate it. I wouldn’t say anymore, but you’re in danger, Arabella. Don’t you see what they want?”

“They? Who?”

“Harriet and ... Carleton.”

”Carleton!”

“Surely you know. Why is he away so much? Is he in London, do you think? Edwin was away on secret business, wasn’t he? Secret business with Harriet. She has their son. Benjie. Have you noticed that Carleton is rather fond of him? She has proved she can have sons. They want to marry. They want to take Eversleigh and rule it between them.”

“Carleton already does that for Edwin. You’ve forgotten Edwin. Eversleigh is Edwin’s.”

“What do you think they plan for Edwin? A little pigeon shooting? No, perhaps that wouldn’t do. The last one was not a success.”

“Charlotte, this is madness.”

“There’s madness in this house, Arabella. The madness of greed and illicit passion and hatred and murder. Open your eyes and look. Who was the first on the scene when you were shot? He hadn’t far to come from the bushes, had he? Don’t you see? Death’s hovering over your head. Like a great black bird. Can’t you hear his wings? You first, then Edwin ...”

“Oh, no ... no ...”

“They are together. I’ve seen them.”