ALBUS: I’ll have some . . . Mum doesn’t let me have sweets. Which one would you start with?
SCORPIUS: Easy. I’ve always regarded the Pepper Imp as the king of the confectionery bag. They’re peppermint sweets that make you smoke at the ears.
ALBUS: Brilliant, then that’s what I’ll —
ROSE: I’m not hitting you.
ALBUS: You
SCORPIUS: She’s hitting you because of me.
ALBUS: What?
SCORPIUS: Listen, I know who you are, so it’s probably only fair you know who I am.
ALBUS: What do you mean you know who I am?
SCORPIUS: You’re Albus Potter. She’s Rose Granger-Weasley. And I am Scorpius Malfoy. My parents are Astoria and Draco Malfoy. Our parents — they didn’t get on.
ROSE: That’s putting it mildly. Your mum and dad are Death Eaters!
SCORPIUS
I know what the rumor is, and it’s a lie.
ALBUS: What — is the rumor?
SCORPIUS: The
ALBUS: To send her back where?
ROSE: The rumor is that he’s Voldemort’s son, Albus.
It’s probably rubbish. I mean . . . look, you’ve got a nose.
SCORPIUS: And it’s just like my father’s! I got his nose, his hair, and his name. Not that that’s a great thing either. I mean — father-son issues, I have them. But, on the whole, I’d rather be a Malfoy than, you know, the son of the Dark Lord.
ROSE: Yes, well, we probably should sit somewhere else. Come on, Albus.
ALBUS: No.
ROSE: Albus. I won’t wait.
ALBUS: And I wouldn’t expect you to. But I’m staying here.
ROSE: Fine!
SCORPIUS: Thank you.
ALBUS: No. No. I didn’t stay — for you — I stayed for your sweets.
SCORPIUS: She’s quite fierce.
ALBUS: Yes. Sorry.
SCORPIUS: No. I like it. Do you prefer Albus or Al?
ALBUS
SCORPIUS
ALBUS
ACT ONE, SCENE FOUR
TRANSITION SCENE
POLLY CHAPMAN: Albus Potter.
KARL JENKINS: A Potter. In our year.
YANN FREDERICKS: He’s got his hair. He’s got hair just like him.
ROSE: And he’s my cousin.
SORTING HAT:
I’ve done this job for centuries
On every student’s head I’ve sat
Of thoughts I take inventories
For I’m the famous Sorting Hat
I’ve sorted high, I’ve sorted low,
I’ve done the job through thick and thin
So put me on and you will know
Which House you should be in . . .
Rose Granger-Weasley.
GRYFFINDOR!
ROSE: Thank Dumbledore.