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I produced a sound of disappointment. I hate going to the doctor, and now I had to go twice in one day? But what could I do? Dr. Poolittle had spoken, and so I had to do what he said. And so moments later we all piled in the car again, and were on our way into town.

“Mh,” said Tex as he studied the screen. “I don’t like what I’m seeing, honey.”

“Do you think the diamond is blocked?” asked Odelia, nervous now.

“There is some progress, but according to my calculations it should have been further along at this point. And the fact that he hasn’t had a bowel movement is worrying me.”

“Don’t say these things, Dr. Poolittle,” I lamented. “Now you’ve got me worried, too!”

“Maybe you could use a plunger?” Brutus suggested. “It works miracles on stopped-up drains and toilets, or so I’ve been told.”

“Nobody is using a plunger on me!” I yelled.

“Relax, buddy,” said Brutus with a grin. “Just kidding.”

“Oh, snuggle bear,” said Harriet. “Now is not the time for jokes.”

“I was just trying to lighten the mood, snow bunny.”

Harriet giggled.“I actually thought it was pretty funny.”

“So what do you suggest, Dad?” asked Odelia.

Tex lowered his head to examine my butt more closely.“Well, I would suggest that…”

And I would have listened with distinct interest to the doctor’s suggestions, but just at that moment I felt a sudden urge taking control over me—a powerful spasm in my lower regions, if you see what I mean—and moments later there was a minor explosion, and when all was said and done, I’d done my business right there on Tex’s nice exam table. It felt good, I can tell you—immensely good. As if I’d just passed a brick!

“Max! You did it!” Dooley cried.

“Good boy,” said Odelia, patting me on the head.

“Way to go, Max!” said Harriet.

“And you didn’t even need a plunger,” said Brutus with a big grin.

But then Tex slowly rose from behind me, and we all watched as remnants of my digestive process dribbled off his face. It was in his eyes, his nose, his hair, even his mouth, for he’d just been saying something.

“Oh, Dad!” said Odelia with a horrified laugh. “You should see yourself!”

“He got the full load,” Brutus said reverently. “The whole enchilada.”

Odelia handed the doctor a wet wipe and as he glanced down at himself and his nice shiny exam table, a sort of howl escaped his lips.“My table!” he cried. “My office!”

“Oh, don’t be such a baby, Dad,” said Odelia. “This is all part and parcel of being a vet. Now let’s find that diamond!”

It didn’t take her long to find the Pink Lady, and I have to say the atmosphere was jubilant—a tough job well done!

The only one who didn’t seem to share in the revels was Tex. He’d cleaned himself up at this point, but still didn’t look happy about the whole business.

“What’s wrong, Dad?” asked Odelia finally.

“I don’t think I’m cut out for this,” the good doctor confessed.

“Cut out for what?”

“This… animal!” he cried, gesturing to me and to his table, which still bore witness of recent events.

“Max is not an animal, Dad,” said Odelia sternly. “Max is family.”

“But look at what he did to my nice table! It smells!”

“So you clean it. Big deal. Haven’t you ever dealt with this kind of thing before?”

“If you’re asking me if a patient ever pooped on my face—no, as a matter of fact they haven’t.”

“Well, if you’re going to be a vet you can’t afford to be squeamish, Dad. So get a grip, will you?”

“I can’t do this,” said Tex, shaking his head.

“If you think this is bad, try pulling a calf from a cow with your bare hands,” said Odelia.

Tex gulped at the picture Odelia’s words conjured up. “I guess I had a more romantic view of the life of a vet. Healing sick birds and dealing with roupy chickens. Maybe a colicky collie.”

“You know what you should do?” said Harriet. “You should ask Vena if you can assist her for a couple of days at the practice. Then you’ll see what it’s really like to be a vet. And if you still like it, then you can decide.”

Odelia dutifully translated Harriet’s words for the doctor, and Tex nodded. “She’s right—you’re right. You’re all absolutely right!”

“I feel all right,” I intimated, still on cloud nine after my accomplishment. I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed, but when cats have had a good poo, they feel on top of the world, and that’s how I felt right now.

“Anyway, we can discuss your future as a vet tonight,” said Odelia. “Right now we need to take this diamond to Uncle Alec, and also tell him to arrest Loretta Gray for trying to steal it.”

“Maybe you should hold off on that,” I said. I’d been doing some thinking while I was lying in that backyard waiting for a certain stone to pop from a certain orifice, and I’d come to the conclusion that the situation wasn’t as clear-cut as it looked.

“What do you mean?” said Odelia with a frown.

So I proceeded to lay out my most recent brainstorm to the small gathering—except for Tex, who’d returned to the bathroom, presumably to wash his face with bleach.

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