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“I don’t see how you can be so freakin’ calm about this!” Kris ground out through what were clearly clenched teeth. “Fact, I don’tsee! I can’t see! We got shadows from Hell coming after us—really from Hell, not just from some bad-ass place people are calling Hell—and we can’t see squat because it’s pitch-black down here!”

“That’s one of the reasons I’m calm.”

“What is?”

“Shadows are impotent in total darkness. They lose all definition, all ability to act. In order to actually do anything to us, they’ll have to turn the lights back on. If I can see them, I can fight them.”

“’Cause you’re the most powerful Keeper in the world.”

“Yeah.”

The mall elf snorted.“Like I’m so impressed.”

“Look, you’ve got every right to be scared, but don’t take it out on me just because I’m the only one here.”

The only sound for a few long moments: the pounding of their hearts, the whisper of their breathing, the shuffle of shoes against a stone floor, the soft hiss of fingertips against a stone wall.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. I understand.”

“I still shouldn’t have said it.”

“I’m not arguing.”

“So what’s the other reason?”

“What?”

“You said that shadows what can’t get it up isone of the reasons you’re calm. What’s the other reason?”

Diana worked“shadows what can’t get it up” back to impotent and grinned. “Just that I’ve been training for this my whole life.”

“This?”

“Yeah.”

“Your whole life?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Damn. You must’ve gone to one bitch of a nursery school.”

“Fine. Not mywhole life.” Her right fingers ran out of wall. She braced her knee and reached around the corner. “Doorway.”

Kris leaned close enough to breathe a question into her ear.“Throne room?”

“With any luck.”

“Oh, yeah. And our luck has been so good.”

Reaching back, Diana stroked two fingers down the other girl’s cheek. “I’m not complaining.”

“Man, you are one cheap date.”

But she traced a smile before she took her fingers away. The silence on the other side of the doorway felt bigger, like it was filling more space. She counted thirty heartbeats, then sighed in relief.“I don’t hear anything. If we follow the wall around, we’ll eventually trip over the dais. Once I have my stuff, we’ll make a run for the access corridors. If we can get into the Emporium, I think we’ll be safe.”

“You think?”

“Jack said the big boss has never come out into the store.” Careful not to lose contact with the stone, she moved them through the doorway and along the wall of the room.

“Always a first time.”

“Here’s a thought. Why don’t you say something positive?”

“Positive?”

“Yeah, like not negative.” Diana rolled her eyes as the pause lengthened. Three steps. Four. Five…

“If memory serves, you got a wicked ass in those pants.”

Ears burning, she stumbled, recovered, and mumbled“Thank you.”

“So, about that training,” Kris prodded, sounding much happier. “Any actual experience?”

“I was with Claire when she closed Hell down the last time, I helped integrate a demon into a small town in northern Ontario, and I…”

“Hawaiian pizza!”

“That wasn’t me. And besides, what’s wrong with…”

“No! I can smell Hawaiian pizza!”

All at once, so could Diana. Spinning around, she scooped Kris’ feet out from under her and followed the mall elf to the floor.

Which was when the lights came on…

…and the Shadowlord smacked a large club against the wall right through the space they’d just vacated.

From her position half sprawled over Kris, Diana could see all four bugs and half a dozen meat-minds waiting motionless in front of the dais. Nearly motionless. One of the meat-minds was chewing in a decidedly guilty way.

Three guesses about what he’s eating, and the first two don’t count. Diana was fairly certain there were stranger things than feeling grateful to ham and pineapple in tomato sauce, but right at the moment she couldn’t think of any.

Grateful wasn’t even close to what the Shadowlord seemed to be feeling.

Pivoting away from the wall, he heaved his club at the chewing meat-mind and screamed,“I don’t care what your union says about lunch breaks!”

“Union?” Kris asked as the gnarled wood smacked meat-mind skull and the two girls scrambled to their feet.

“Otherworld Pan-dimensional Service Employees Union.”

“You’re fucking kidding me.”

“Yes. Run!”

*

“I’m glad to see you’re taking me seriously.”

Dean dropped the pillowcase into the washing machine.“How’s that?”

“I just saw you go through Dr. Rebik’s pockets.”

“And how is that taking you seriously?” he asked, reaching for the laundry detergent.

Austin jumped onto the dryer, walked over, and peered into the tub.“You’re looking for clues.”

“I’m looking for tissues.”

“To send away for forensic testing?”

“To keep from filling the washing machine with little bits of wet tissue.” He closed the lid, checked that the water temperature was on cold/cold, and started the timer. “I know I’ll be after regretting this, but what kind of clues did you think I’d find? If Meryat’s the bad guy…girl…”

“Corpse.”

Given the look he’d got at her face, that was hard to argue with. “…then isn’t Dr. Rebik the victim?”

“So?”