Three Little Words

“I want you to stay here, but we’ll make it work if you go somewhere else. I can fly for free till I’m twenty-four, so I can come visit every— Hold on, why’re you shaking your head?”

“It won’t work. I don’t think you understand. I… need you.”

I paused and then asked, “What do you mean?”

“You probably think I’m crazy,” she said. “I want to go slow with one thing but rush everything else. I mean, we’re practically engaged—in my head, at least—even though I can’t bring myself to go all the way. But I can’t imagine life without you. I’ve been miserable these past couple of days.

Tonight convinced me: I don’t want to go anywhere else.”

“Then why’d you mention the other schools? Never mind. I think I understand.”

“Yeah,” she admitted quietly. “I guess I got scared. I… wanted to give you an opening if you want to get rid of me.”

“You’re so strange sometimes.”

“No, just… afraid… that you might not like me as much as I like you.”

“How can you possibly think that? Still? After tonight?”

“I… don’t know. I just do. Not all the time,” she added quickly. “Just…

sometimes. I worry that you’ll think I’m weird or perverted or dirty or something.”

“I think you’re weird and perverted and dirty, and I like you even more because of it.”

“Thank you.”

“Besides, I still haven’t told you everything either. We’re practically

engaged in my head too, but I can’t bring myself to tell you my darkest secrets. They aren’t dark, really, but they’re… pretty unusual.”

“More than me liking pain and… um… other kinky stuff?”

“Way more,” I said automatically. Then I thought about it. “Although…

no, not really. Just different. Still, I’m not ready to tell you.”

“Then I guess we’re both taking baby steps.”

“Yeah.”

“And it’s a good thing we’re together. We’re the same kind of weird.”

She kissed my chest and sighed. “Wren says you’re going to rock my world when we go all the way.”

“She says the same about you.”

“Yeah, I know. I still need to wring her neck.” She laughed again. “It’s driving her crazy, not being able to tell me things. She wants to, but she’s afraid of what you’ll do if she does.”

“Nah, I’m all bark and no bite.”

“She doesn’t think so. I know you think she’s pushy—and she can be—

but she really listens to you. I didn’t realize it at the time, but looking back, I can see where she stopped matchmaking whenever you had a talk with her.

At least, until she grew impatient again.”

“That’s her biggest weakness,” I agreed. “Impatience.”

“And your biggest strength. You’d’ve dumped me long ago if you weren’t patient.”

“Well, you’re worth it.”

“Thank you,” she said softly. “You’re worth it too. I can’t imagine anything you’d tell me that’d make me think otherwise. And believe me, my imagination is pretty wild.”

“Not as wild as the truth.”

“Try me.”

“Not yet,” I said after a long pause. “When you’re ready.”

“When we go all the way?”

“Probably before then. I’ve… been thinking about it. I don’t think it’s fair to go all the way before you know some things about me.”

“Then I need to convince you I can handle anything you tell me.”

“You’re doing a pretty good job already.”

“So my Scheherazade plan is working?”

“Like a charm!” I laughed.

“Good, ’cause I like telling you my stories and secrets. All my life I’ve

had to keep ’em to myself.”

“Well, you don’t have to with me.”

“I know. That’s why I want to stay here, why I moved in with you, why I need you.” She raised herself on one elbow and looked at me. “So it’s settled? I’m going to get my Master’s with Siobhan and be your live-in girlfriend?”

“Sounds good to me,” I said.

And just like that, we made our fourth major decision as a couple.

I called home on Sunday while Christy went to Mass. Mom answered and we talked for ten minutes before I worked up the nerve to tell her about Christy moving in with me.

“So it’s serious?” Mom said.

“I think so.”

“Whatever happened to Kendall?” she asked out of the blue.

“She graduated last June. I don’t know what she did after that. Medical school, I hope.”

“Her family wasn’t at camp last summer. I’ll have to ask Susan if she’s heard anything.”

“Drew still plays football here. I read his name in the newspaper every once in a while, but I haven’t seen him since Kendall and I broke up. It’s a big university, and we run in different circles.”

“That’s okay. I’ll ask Susan. She’ll know. Back to you and Christy. So, things are getting serious. Do we need to meet her parents?”

“Eventually. No rush, though. We’re still taking baby steps.”

“Living together is a pretty big one. Your dad and I didn’t do it till we were married.”

“Yeah, but you were doing other things before then,” I teased. “You were married in December; I was born in June. I can do the math, Mom.”

“You came early.”

“Not that early,” I said dryly. “Anyway, she should be home soon, so I’d better get off the phone. She likes to call her family on Sunday.”

“Okay. Take care, honey. And thanks for calling. I love you.”

“I love you too, Mom. Bye.”