The Ranch

“I love you too, Stu. Good night,” she said, and hung up, and then turned to him and he put his arms around her. He just stood there holding her, and then he put her in his truck, and drove her home to the little cabin behind the corral. He drove in as quietly as he could and turned the lights off, and they sat there for a moment. It had been quite a night for both of them, and Tanya was still feeling shaken. His bronco ride had been nothing compared to what came later.

“Are you okay, Tanny?” he asked gently.

“Yeah. I think so.” They were about a quarter mile from her cabin, but she had no desire to go there. “Stuff like that always shakes me up for a while.”

“Do you want to come in?” he asked. He would have understood if she didn't, if she wanted to go home and go to bed. But he wanted to be with her, and even though this wasn't allowed, it was better than being seen coming out of her cabin. He would have lost his job in either case if someone saw them together, but Gordon had decided days before that he thought she was worth it, “You don't have to do anything you don't want to, Tanny,” he said kindly. “I'll take you back up to the cabin if you like.”

“I'd like to come in,” she said quietly. She wanted to see where he lived, what he had, what he liked, she just wanted to be with him.

“I think everyone's out, but we need to be kind of quiet about it.” She knew how much trouble he'd be in if someone saw them, and she worried about it. The other cabins were nearby, although his was less accessible than most. But she didn't want anyone to see them.

“Is this all right for you?” she asked with worried eyes, and he smiled the smile that tore her heart out.

“About as all right as it gets,” he said, and then got out of the truck, and strode quickly into his cabin. She followed him in and he locked the door, pulled down the shades and turned on the lights, and she was surprised at how orderly it was, and how pleasant. She had expected it to look a lot rougher and a lot more disheveled. The cabin itself, as it had been provided to him, was nicely decorated, with a denim couch and Western decor, and all around the room he had put photographs of his son, his parents, a horse he'd loved. There were books and magazines in neat piles, some tools in a neat box, and an entire bookcase filled with music. She was surprised by how many albums of hers he had, but she also liked his other choices.

There was a living room, a large kitchen with a dining area, and that was neat too, though the refrigerator was all but empty. He had what she called bachelor food. Peanut butter, an avocado, two lemons and a tomato, some soda water, a lot of beer, and a lifetime supply of Oreo cookies.

“You must not do a lot of cooking.” She laughed.

“I eat in the staff dining room,” he said, pointing out, as he pulled out a refrigerator bin, that he also had eggs, bacon, jam, butter, and English muffins.

“I'm impressed,” she laughed, and he put a pot on for some coffee. He had whiskey and wine and offered her both, but she said she wasn't a drinker, although after the fracas at the rodeo he thought a shot of whiskey might have done her good, but she said she didn't want it. And as she walked out of the kitchen again, with a mug of coffee in her hand, she glimpsed his bedroom. It looked small and spare. There was a bed, a dresser, and a large comfortable chair. He pointed out that he didn't spend a lot of time there. But it was nice being in his world, seeing where he lived, and she felt surprisingly at home there. It was nicer than a lot of homes she had seen in her lifetime.

“It's almost as big as the house I grew up in when I was a kid,” he said, smiling. “There were two bedrooms, my parents had one of them, and there were six of us kids in the other.”

“Sounds like where I grew up,” she smiled. “I'd probably still be there, if I hadn't gotten a music scholarship to Berkeley. That changed my life,” she said, thinking back, and to the women she had met there.

“You changed mine,” he said softly, as they sat down on the couch, and he put an arm around her. And a few minutes later, he put on some music. It was so peaceful there, she couldn't imagine any harm ever coming to her with him. She felt completely safe and totally protected. They started to kiss again after a while, and all the terror and the relief and the sheer horror of what had happened that night seemed to flow away from her as he held her. They kissed for a long time, and then he looked at her. He didn't want to do anything she didn't want, or would regret later. At any time, he would have taken her back to her cabin if that was what she wanted.

“Tanny?” His voice was gentle in the dark. He had turned off the lights and lit a fire, and the music lulled them as they held each other and kissed and slowly discovered each other's bodies. “Are you all right with this, Tanny? I don't want to do anything you don't want,” he whispered.