The changeling

My grandmother raised the point which had occurred to me. If Lucie came all the local children would feel slighted if they were not asked. Then my grandmother had an idea. She would get Jenny to come and help in the kitchen. She could bring Lucie ... and Lucie should join the party. And so it was arranged.

When I put the proposition to Jenny her eyes shone with delight. I said: “And Lucie shall come to see the conjuror with the other children.”

She clasped her hands together. “She’s been talking of nothing but that there conjuror ever since yesterday.”

Lucie jumped up and down with glee when I told her she was to come to the party. I knelt down and put my arms around her. I felt a tremendous tenderness towards the child and a need to protect her.

It occurred to me a little later that all the children would be in their party dresses, and what had Lucie but her little smock? True, it would be clean and neat but there would be a marked difference between her and the others. Belinda had numerous dresses which she did not need. Why should not Lucie have one of these? I broached the matter to my grandmother and she thought it an excellent idea.

I consulted Leah who found a very pretty dress which she had made for Belinda and which she had not worn for some time. It was pale blue with a frill at the neck and a flounced skirt; and there was a bow of blue ribbon at the waist. “That is just the thing,” I said.

“I don’t think it was ever one of Belinda’s favorites,” said Leah. “I made a mistake with all those flounces.”

“I think it is charming and I am sure Lucie will be delighted. She will never have had such a dress before.”

When I took it along to the cottage I was immensely gratified. I had never seen such joy in a child’s face before. Jenny watched with her hands clasped together. “Oh, Miss Rebecca,” she said, “you be very good to we.” I was touched as I had rarely been. Jenny’s love for that child was beautiful to see. The child’s happiness meant everything to her. I thought Lucie deprived when compared with Belinda, but how could she be with love like that? It was a joyous occasion. Now I could talk about the exploits of conjurors with the utmost freedom.

We laughed and chatted. I could not believe that Jenny was the same person whom I had seen singing in the lanes.

Belinda with Leah helped to dress the Christmas tree. She was a little imperious giving orders. “This is where / want this ...” and so on.

There were to be presents for all the children and these would be distributed before the conjuror arrived. I had chosen a doll for Lucie. It had long flaxen hair and eyes which shut when the doll was held backwards.

There were candles on the tree which would be lighted at dusk. Belinda shrieked with delight when she saw the candles. She said it ought to be Christmas every day.

And at last it came.

All the family from Pencarron were with us. They were going to stay the night because it was a fair way to Pencarron Manor and we did not know what the weather would be like.

Then there were Jack and Marian with the twins, Jacco and Anne-Mary: and the Wilminghams with their son and daughter and three grandchildren were to come for Christmas Day.

There would also be another little girl and boy from about a mile away. My grandparents had said that Christmas Day was for the children and that it should be devoted to their pleasure.

Jenny arrived with Lucie who looked very pretty in her blue flounces. Her eyes lit up with pleasure when she saw me and she ran to me and hugged me round the knees as she usually did. I found this very endearing. I sensed that she was a little overawed and rather eager to keep at my side.

My grandmother kissed her and, taking her by the hand, led her into the hall. I was thrilled to see the wonder in her eyes as she contemplated the tree. The other children were all gathered there. Belinda came over and I was amused to see with what dignity she greeted Lucie. I had already spoken to her and told her that Lucie was coming and that as she was the hostess she must make sure that all her guests were comfortable.

She had liked the idea of that.

“This is my house,” she told Lucie immediately. “I am the hostess.” Lucie nodded but she could not take her eyes from the Christmas tree.

My grandmother and I gave out the presents and when I saw Lucie’s joy in her flaxen haired doll I felt a wave of happiness. Then I felt rather guilty to be so contented without my mother. I uttered a little prayer to her. “I have not forgotten you. I never shall. But I am so happy to be able to do this for the child.” In that moment I almost felt that she was beside me, sharing in my happiness and that gave me immense comfort.

The conjuror had arrived. As we arranged the chairs for the children I heard Belinda say: “Lucie, you’ve got my dress.”

Lucie looked down with dismay at the flounces of which she was so proud.

“I didn’t say you could have it. It’s mine.”