Stranger in a Strange Land

She answered promptly, «I am here because I wish to be.»

«Mmm…I'm not sure that's responsive.»

«Jubal, sometimes I wish you were small enough to spank. May I finish what I was saying?»

«You have the floor.» Would any of them be here? Would Maryam have married Stinky and gone off to Beirut if Mike had not approved? The name «Fatima Michele» might be an acknowledgment of her adopted faith plus her husband's wish to compliment his closest friend — or it might be code as explicit as baby Abby's double name. If so, did Stinky wear his antlers unaware? Or with serene pride as Joseph was alleged to have done? Uh … it must be concluded that Stinky knew the minutes of his houri; water-brothership permitted no omission so important. If it was important, which as a physician and agnostic Jubal doubted. But to them it would be —

«You aren't listening.»

«Sorry. Woolgathering.» — and stop it, you nasty old man… reading meanings into names that mothers give their children! Next you'll be taking up numerology … then astrology … then spiritualism — until senility has progressed so far that all there is left is custodial treatment for a hulk too dim-witted to discorporate in dignity. Go to locked drawer nine in the clinic, code «Lethe» — and use two grains, although one is more than enough —

«There's no need for those clippings, because we check the news about Mike… and Ben has given us a water promise to let us know any private news we need at once. But, Jubal, Mike can't be hurt. If you would visit the Nest, as we three have, you would know this.»

«I have never been invited.»

«We didn't have invitations, either. Nobody has to have an invitation to his own home. You're making excuses, Jubal. Ben urged you to, and both Dawn and Duke sent word.»

«Mike hasn't invited me.»

«Boss, that Nest belongs to me and to you quite as much as it does to Mike. Mike is first among equals… as you are here. Is this Abby's home?»

«Happens,» he answered, «that title vests in her… with lifetime tenancy for me.» Jubal had changed his will, knowing that Mike's will made it unnecessary to provide for any water brother of Mike's. But not being sure of the “water” status of this nestling — save that she was usually wet — he had made redispositions in her favor and in favor of descendants of certain others. «I hadn't intended to tell you, but there is no harm in your knowing.»

«Jubal… you've made me cry. And you've almost made me forget what I was saying. And I must say it. Mike would never hurry you, you know that. I grok he is waiting for fullness — and I grok you are, too.»

«Mmm… I grok you speak rightly.»

«All right. I think you are especially glum today because Mike has been arrested again. But that's happened many — »

«“Arrested”? I hadn't heard about this!» He added. «Damn it, girl — »

«Jubal, Jubal! Ben hasn't called; that's all we need to know. You know how many times Mike has been arrested — in the army, as a carnie, other places--half a dozen times as a preacher. He never hurts anybody; he lets them do it. They can never convict him and he gets out as soon as he wishes.»

«What is it this time?»

«Oh, the usual nonsense — public lewdness, statutory rape, conspiracy to defraud, keeping a disorderly house, contributing to the delinquency of minors, conspiracy to evade truancy laws — »

«Huh?»

«Their license to operate a parochial school was canceled; the kids didn't go back to public school. No matter, Jubal — none of it matters. The one thing they are technically guilty of can't be proved. Jubal, if you had seen the Nest you would know that even the F.D.S. couldn't sneak a spy-eye into it. So relax. After a lot of publicity, charges will be dropped — and crowds will be bigger than ever.»

«Hmm! Anne, does Mike rig these persecutions himself?»

She looked startled. «Why, I never considered the possibility, Jubal. Mike can't lie, you know.»

«Does it involve lying? Suppose he planted true rumors? But ones that can't be proved in court?»

«Do you think Michael would do that?»

«I don't know. I do know that the slickest way to lie is to tell the right amount of truth — then shut up. It wouldn't be the first time that persecution has been courted for its headline value. All right, I'll forget it unless it turns out he can't handle it. Are you still “Front”?»

«If you can refrain from chucking Abby under the chin and saying cootchy-coo and similar uncommercial noises, I'll fetch her. Otherwise I had better tell Dorcas to get up.»

«Bring in Abby. I'm going to make an honest effort to make commercial noises — a brand-new plot, known as boy-meets-girl.»

«Say, that's a good one, Boss! I wonder why nobody thought of it before? Half a sec — » She hurried out.