Stranger in a Strange Land

«Don't use that word to a lawyer; straining at gnats and swallowing camels is a required course in law schools. Besides, there is precedent. In the fifteenth century the Pope deeded the western hemisphere to Spain and Portugal and nobody cared that the real estate was occupied by Indians with their own laws, customs, and property rights. His grant was effective, too. Look at a map and notice where Spanish is spoken and where Portuguese is spoken.»

«Yes, but — Ben, this isn't the fifteenth century.»

«It is to a lawyer. Jill, if the High Court rules that the Larkin Decision applies, Smith is in a position to grant concessions which may be worth millions, more likely billions. If he assigns his claim to the administration, then Secretary Douglas controls the plums.»

«Ben, why should anybody want that much power?»

«Why does a moth fly toward light? But Smith's financial holdings are almost as important as his position as nominal king-emperor of Mars. The High Court could knock out his squatter's rights but I doubt if anything could shake his ownership of the Lyle Drive and a chunk of Lunar Enterprises. What happens if he dies? A thousand alleged cousins would pop up, of course, but the Science Foundation has fought off such money-hungry vermin for years. It seems possible that, if Smith dies without a will, his fortune reverts to the state.»

«Do you mean the Federation or the United States?»

«Another question to which I have no answer. His parents come from two countries of the Federation and he was born outside them all … and it will make a crucial difference to some people who votes that stock and licenses those patents. It won't be Smith; he won't know a stock proxy from a traffic ticket. It is likely to be whoever can grab him and hang on. I doubt if Lloyd's would insure his life; he strikes me as a poor risk.»

«The poor baby! The poor, poor infant!»

VI

THE RESTAURANT in Hagerstown had «atmosphere» — tables scattered over a lawn leading down to a lake and more tables in the boughs of three enormous trees. Jill wanted to eat in a tree, but Ben bribed the maitre d'hôtel to set up a table near the water, then ordered a stereo tank placed by it.

Jill was miffed. «Ben, why pay these prices if we can't eat in the trees and have to endure that horrible jitterbox?»

«Patience, little one. Tables in trees have microphones; they have to have them for service. This table is not gimmicked — I hope — as I saw the waiter take it from a stack. As for the tank, not only is it un-American to eat without stereo but the racket will interfere with a directional mike — if Mr. Douglas's investigators are taking an interest.»

«Do you really think they're shadowing us, Ben?» Jill shivered. «I'm not cut out for a life of crime.»

«Pish and likewise tush! When I was on the General Synthetics scandals I never slept twice in one place and ate nothing but packaged food. You get to like it — stimulates the metabolism.»

«My metabolism doesn't need it. All I require is one elderly, wealthy patient.»

«Not going to marry me, Jill?»

«After my future husband kicks off, yes. Or maybe I'll be so rich I can keep you as a pet.»

«How about starting tonight?»

«Afterhe kicks off.»

During the dinner the musical show which had been banging their eardrums stopped. An announcer's head filled the tank; he smiled and said, «NWNW, New World Networks and its sponsor, Wise Girl Malthusian Lozenges, is honored to surrender time for a history-making broadcast by the Federation Government. Remember, friends, every wise girl uses Wise Girls. Easy to carry, pleasant to take, guaranteed no-fail, and approved for sale without prescription under Public Law 1312. Why take a chance on old-fashioned, unesthetic, harmful, unsure methods? Why risk losing his love and respect?» The lovely, lupine announcer glanced aside and hurried the commercial: «I give you the Wise Girl, who in turn brings you the Secretary General!»

The 3-D picture cut to a young woman, so sensuous, so mammalian, so seductive, as to make any male unsatisfied with local talent. She stretched and wiggled and said in a bedroom voice, «Ialways use Wise Girl.»

The picture dissolved and an orchestra played Hail to Sovereign Peace. Ben said, «Do you use Wise Girl?»

«None o' your business!» Jill looked ruffled and added, «It's a quack nostrum. Anyhow, what makes you think I need it?»