Saraband for Two Sisters

I could not stop thinking of her lying in that room we had shared for so many years while the dread disease afflicted her. Bersaba tossing in fever, delirious ... no longer my calm self-possessed sister-the clever part of us, the one whom I had thought I should never have to do without * * * A few days passed during which I did not go far afield. Carlotta was anxious that I should not until I was adequately dressed and as she said had cast off some of my country manners, which she made me feel would he despised in London. I must learn to walk with more dignity, hold my head high, to move with grace, to bow, to curtsy, and to overcome a certain accent which would not be acceptable in London society. I allowed myself to be primed and toot an interest in it largely because it turned my mind from brooding on what was happening at home. I had to shut out the thought of Bersaba’s face on the pillowfevered, her eyes wild, and the horrible signs of her illness upon her. I kept telling myself that I could do no good by dwelling on it, so I meekly allowed myself to be turned into a copy of a town-bred girl. Carlotta was certainly enjoying the operation. I wondered whether she enjoyed scoring over us for some reason. Although I was parted from Bersaba I still thought of us together, and I asked myself now whether Carlotta had taken up Bastian as she did because she knew of Bersaba’s fondness for him. It seemed that that might be characteristic of her.

On the third day after my arrival Senara returned. She embraced me warmly and seemed really pleased to see me, and asked a good many questions about Bersaba. I had the impression that she really cared about my mother.

“Poor Tamsyn,” she said. “I can picture her distress. She was always more like a mother to me than a sister though she was but a year older. She mothered everyone ... even her own mother. I know she will be in great distress. I am glad to have you here with us and I shall write to your mother and tell her so.” She was more sympathetic and understanding than her daughter and I was able to talk to her and tell her how homesick I was and how I was wondering whether I ought to go home as Carlotta did not seem to think I fitted into the London scene. She shook her head. “You have a certain charm, Angelet, which is appealing, and I am sure many people here will appreciate it. Your fresh country innocence will seem charming to people who are weary of the society ways, which are often false. »

“Carlotta wants to change me.”

“We must see that she doesn’t succeed too well.”

Senara certainly comforted me, particularly when she talked about her childhood and how she and my mother had been as close as sisters. “I know how you feel about Bersaba,” she said. “Of course your mother and I were not twins, but the manner in which I came to the castle made her feel she had to protect me and I always enjoyed that motherly security she threw around me. She does it to many. It’s her way.”

So I felt better when Senara returned, and when I went riding with her and we passed along by the river I was temporarily forgetful of everything but the wonder of it, for as we approached the city the boats on the river were so numerous that they almost touched one another.

Senara was pleased at my wonder. She told me that I was in the greatest port in the world and that ships came here from every place I could imagine. I was excited and comforted to see some of the ships from my father’s East India Company because that made me feel that I was not so very far away. How wonderful they looked! How powerfully built! They were equipped to face the storms they would meet at sea as well as armed against pirates. Then I began to wonder what my father was doing now-and Fennimore and Bastian-and fear touched me that some ill might befall them and if Bersaba were to die... .

Senara, glancing at me, saw the misery in my face and she said kindly, “Everything will come out well, I promise you.”

“How can you know?” I asked.

“I know these things,” she told me. I thought, “She is a witch,” and I wanted to

 believe she was so that I could assure myself that she was right. She showed me the wharves where goods were being unloaded some by the Company’s ships and others from Amsterdam, Germany, Italy, and France. I could not help being enthralled, and after that a little of the burden of fear lightened. Senara had said that all would be well and that meant that my family would be safe. I believed Senara. As a witch she could have special knowledge of these matters. The days, which had seemed endless by the end of the first week, began to fly past.