On The Wings of Hope : Prose

Google : I categorically welcome you, Ivanov Ivan Ivanovich, 1975 year of birth, single, no criminal status, passport series-number xxxx-xxxxxx, you have logged into the Google from your usual IP address 209.85.229.104,  physical location : Zazhopinsk, Red Lanterns str., 20-22.

Anonymous : What, have they already learnt my passport number ? Oh heck, what level has this technics reached. I have a really bad feeling about all that, that’s not for good, I bet it ! Where have they grown you, oh my ingenious one ?

Google : System message. Last time you have watched orgies at porno.ru and paid for a whore on dosug’s more than thirty days ago. The actuality of resources content could become outdated. Would you like to visit this portal once again ?

Anonymous : Nay, I have already found myself a girl.  Gimme something better.

Google : Nevertheless we still insist on displaying contents of this resource to you. Inline advertising sponsors have already paid us millions of dollars. It will be really bad to disappoint them.

Anonymous : Fuck off, I tell you ! I dunno want to masturbate, you berk !

Google : I will be accurate and show you all this in a popup window. Dunno want to watch – stare none, but we’ll still count this as your own click.

Anonymous : Get away, ye goat !

Google : Voila, it’s ready ! Oh, have you see her big tits ?! OoOo, I am in ecstasies already !gOOgle ! Listen, can you make her picture your wallpaper on a desktop ?

Anonymous : Just try it, freak !

Google : All right, all right, I won’t. We are going to have a corporate “meeting” today in our headquarters, that’s why I’m so funny kind today, for so I have been coded. A corporative Easter-egg, you know. So, what’s are you gonna to see today, aye ? Actual topics in accordance with a context of your search queries : “Beer”, “Women”, “Chicks”, “Home alone along with friends and beer”, “Dom-2”, “Ass”, “Shit”, “Dung”, “Crap”, “Hell, what a shit”, “Blab”, “Google”, “Google’s freak” (*blocked*), “Russian national team”, “Russian national team – herd of goats”, “Putin”, “fascists”, “herbs”, “Putin’s Plan”.

Anonymous : Hold on, I was inquiring about Russian national team more than a year ago ! Should you not delete the history of old search queries, huh ?

Google : Ya-ya, I owe so much to so many. In their own opinion, yeap.

Anonymous : * Thinking *. Hockey-dockey, what should be serf today for fun ? Anecdot.ru, Bash.org.ru or Kremlin.ru, hmm… ? Heck, let it be Kremlin.

Google : Here we go !

Anonymous : Eeeee…what’s the fuck have you given me a link to a porno in the main window ?!

Google : Me ? Gave you a link ? I give nothing to nobody ! It’s the Google Public DNS gave it to you. It’s our new feature, called “dns-rewriting”. Say, you type kremlin-this-and-that – and get a resolve to a porno, your favorite !

Anonymous : F*ck, how to switch off this bullshit ?!

Google :  No way, I’m afraid. Unsupported user request, so to speak. 8.8.8.8 – that’s our magic number of sorts in Chrome OS. Hardcoded, permanently. Sooo, do you like these boobs ? OOOO, f*ck, I’m gonna end now ! Oooo ! gOOgle !

Anonymous : Get me out of here, you scum ! Let me serf normally !

Google : Nay, nay, nay ! It’s erectio stimulation day today ! It’s all already prepaid, so enjoy ! And if you are really gonna to cry so loudly in a microphone, I’m gonna to set mentioned wallpaper on your desktop for everyone to see ! And publish your “hot” links in Odnoklassniki.ru, I have your password for a long time already. And will also mail them to all your friends. And scorn you in a Twitter. And mock you in your blog. So stop provoking me ! I am sooooo kind today ….

Anonymous : Baaaaaaassssssttttaaaaarrrrrdddd !

2013. To be continued …

03.10.2010

Accident

And so you are reading these lines … an accident? And how many there were at all in your life?

Here you were born absolutely casually … Your mum somehow accidently happened to meet your father, and thus they have decided to give birth to a child - too spontaneously and casually, as you might have guessed. Don’t you accidentally remember how all this once began?