Induction

Her body remained in the chair, waiting for Finn to say his goodbyes. He didn’t come out of the room. All had been quiet behind the door, and I began to worry for him until it slowly opened and Finn’s silhouette came into view. He approached the group apprehensively, eyes red and puffy from tears. As he removed the sheet from Noelle’s face, he picked up her hand, brought it to his lips and brushed soft kisses across her knuckles. Then he knelt there, holding her hand and stroking her hair. He wept against her neck as he whispered words into her ear, too hushed for us to hear. His touch was gentle and loving. There wasn’t a dry eye among us; even the soldiers, trained to shove down their emotion, cried outright for Finn’s loss.

* * *

We wrapped Noelle in the sheet and carried her body up to the deck. It was still dark, the morning sun not yet peeking through the gloom. Finn held his baby girl as he stood silent over his wife’s corpse and mourned. No amount of consoling would ease this man’s pain. He was a broken shell of what he once was. The light in his eyes had gone out. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one concerned about his ability to care for his child in his current state.

Walking to him, I put one hand on his shoulder and rubbed the side of the newborns face with the other. He jerked away as if my touch burned him. “Get away from us,” he barked at me. His face was a muddled distortion of anger and pain, and it was all directed at me. I realized then that he blamed me for his wife’s death. Not that I could blame him; I felt responsible. Logically I knew the guilt was wrong, I had done all I could. Semantics weren’t enough to rid me of the suffocating culpability I harbored. “Leave me alone, all of you.”

Against our better judgment we left him on deck with what was left of his family. Nancy took Gabby into their room, most likely to try to coax her to sleep. The rest of us sat at the kitchen table, not talking. Meg leaned her head on my shoulder, and I knew she had fallen asleep by the change in her breathing.

The sun made its first appearance on the new day. As its rays shone down onto the blighted land, I caught movement out the window and to my right.

“No, Finn,” I gasped and jumped out of my seat. The sudden jostling woke Meg and she let out a strangled scream. The men followed my gaze and were out of their seats as well, running up the stairs and shouting for Finn to stop. Finn had placed Noelle’s body into the rowboat and faced us as he dug oars into water, increasing the distance between us. His newborn child lay swaddled in blankets at the front of the little craft.

“Finn, what are you doing?”

A cold stare that would have turned water to ice was his only response. The baby’s shrill cry drew the attention of the closest zombies and their efforts increased in fervor as the boat glided by.

We watched helplessly as he paddled himself past the ever-present group of hungry fiends and away from the houseboat. Our shouts and pleas for him to stop fell on deaf ears, and we watched as the group of undead began getting more animated. The prospect of living flesh worked them into a frenzy and they pushed at the end of the dock and fell into the water to get to their meal.

Finn rowed around the bend and was gone from sight. He was lost to us. He’d checked out the moment I told him of his wife’s fate. We waited on deck for hours in hopes of seeing his boat coming back to us. One by one we went back down into the cabins. Meg came last when she gave up hope of his return.

Life went on. Surprisingly, no one spoke of Finn’s departure after that first day. We had all lost people we cared about, but this loss felt foreign to us because the ending hadn’t come with a bloody death. Finn had chosen to leave our safe haven. He had put himself and his child in harm’s way. No matter how bad things were, I just couldn’t reconcile his decision.

Chapter 22 Sneaky Bastard

It didn’t take long for us to figure out another foraging trip had to be made, five days to be exact. Our supplies were dwindling. We needed water if we planned on surviving. This was how our new life was going to be. Living meant putting ourselves back in harm’s way.

The sun had reached its zenith when the three men left. With no other means to make the trip, they were forced to take the Jet Ski. It was meant for two, but the three men were able to fit. Their plan was to search for another small craft along the way so they could fit supplies, and allow us a means to leave the boat without having to use precious fuel or take a swim. They readied themselves for departure, each checking their weapons and reloading magazines.

Adam took me by the arm and led me into the galley. “I need to talk to you.” He stood before me, his hand still holding my arm. “I know you feel what’s happening between us, and I know you’ve been avoiding me because you’re afraid to let go of Jake.”

“Stop, Adam. Don’t say anything else.”