Charlie the Kitten Who Saved a Life

‘No, I don’t! I don’t know how I’ve given you the impression that I was interested in you in that way, but if I have, I’m very sorry. I did think we got on well, as neighbours, as friends perhaps, and I’ve enjoyed your company in the evenings. It’s true Daniel’s been neglecting me recently—’

Daniel gasped again, and put his paw to his head. He looked like he was going to fall over.

‘—and yes, it has made me sad, but that doesn’t mean I’ve stopped loving him. And it doesn’t mean I’m going to jump into the arms of another man, just because you’ve told me about your divorce, and let me confide in you. I shouldn’t have done that. Daniel and I will sort out our problems. I don’t want you to come round anymore.’

‘Oh, surely there’s no need to be like that,’ he said. ‘I think—’

But we never found out what he thought. Because at that point Daniel suddenly seemed to burst into life again and, throwing his keys on the hall table, he raced into the lounge and skidded to a halt within nose-touching distance of furry-faced Kevin, who staggered backwards away from Nicky with a look of surprise.

‘You heard my wife,’ Daniel said in a growly voice like an angry dog. ‘Go.’

‘No need for that, mate,’ Kevin protested, waving his paws in front of him as if he was smoothing something down. ‘Nicky and I have just been having a nice friendly chat over a cup of tea. While you were neglecting her. As she said.’

‘Dan, I didn’t say … well, I didn’t mean …’ Nicky was saying. ‘Don’t! Dan, leave him alone. Don’t hit him! It was my fault, I must have given him the wrong impression.’

I felt my fur standing on end. Daniel had got hold of Kevin by his jumper and had his paw screwed up into a fist, like a weapon. Kevin’s eyes were wide with fear, and he was making a stuttering noise that sounded like ‘Uh … uh … uh …’

‘Dan!’ Nicky squealed more loudly. ‘Don’t! It won’t help! Please don’t do something you’ll regret.’

‘Sparrows alive!’ I meowed.

I wasn’t going to wait to see what happened. Nicky was one of my favourite humans, and Daniel was making her upset, even more upset than she’d been with Kevin. I wasn’t going to stand for it. I wasn’t a timid little kitten anymore, I was a fighter, a rescuer, a cat who sorted things out and got things done. Just as Daniel was raising his paw to hit Kevin right in his furry face, I leapt up onto the sofa, threw myself at Daniel and clung to his jacket by my claws, yowling in his ear.

‘Stop it, for the love of catnip!’ I shouted. ‘No fighting! Nicky doesn’t like it.’

‘Ouch! Bloody hell, Charlie, what the hell are you doing? Get off me, you crazy kitten. For God’s sake!’ he cried, struggling to loosen my claws from the cloth of his jacket. The fight seemed to have gone out of him, because even though I’d shocked him, he was being gentle with me now. ‘There you go. Get down,’ he said, putting me back on the floor. ‘Stay there! What’s the matter, woman?’ he added, turning to Nicky, who seemed to be trying not to laugh.

‘Sorry.’ She reached out and put both paws round his waist. ‘He didn’t hurt you, did he? I’m sorry, Dan, but that was so funny. It was … as if he knew someone had to stop you. Are you all right?’

‘Yes.’ Daniel stared back at her. ‘I’m OK. I’m sorry. I lost my temper, and you’re right, it would only have made things worse.’

‘Yes. He’s not worth it. He was just trying his luck. I shouldn’t have let him get so close to me. It was stupid of me.’

‘No. Stupid of me, leaving you on your own every night, without giving a thought to how you felt. I’m such an idiot, such a selfish idiot! God, Nicky, if you ever left me I don’t know what I’d do.’

‘I’m not going to leave you, you fool. I knew we’d sort things out eventually. And I know you’re working so hard, I can understand you want a drink with your mates sometimes, but …’

‘But not every night. It’s not fair, and I shouldn’t have been doing it. I should be coming home to you and Benjamin. Can you forgive me?’

‘Of course. Don’t be daft.’

‘And you won’t see Kevin anymore?’ He turned to look around the room. ‘Where is he?’

‘He sneaked out quickly when Charlie threw himself at you,’ Oliver meowed. Oliver was looking at me in a very strange way. ‘I think … I have to say … I think you saved the day just then, Charlie boy.’

‘I don’t think we’ll be seeing much of Kevin now,’ Nicky said, laughing again. ‘You and Charlie have both scared the life out of him.’

‘Good. What a creep! I suppose I should feel sorry for him. He’s probably lonely, and wishes he had a lovely wife like you to come home to.’

‘Yes, well, he’ll have to find one of his own.’ She cuddled up to him and they started to kiss each other.

‘I think we should make ourselves scarce now,’ I meowed at Oliver.

‘Let those two cats out, will you?’ Daniel muttered at the same time.

‘Did you bring them home with you?’ Nicky asked him as she went to open the door for us.