Agatha H and the Voice of the Castle

Suddenly another voice was heard. “Sniveling sand-dragons! Is Carson actually hooked up to that brain-sucking abomination?”

There was a clatter of footsteps, and one of the young women from the coffee shop appeared, leading a tall old man. He was dressed in a rich outfit topped with a rather gaudy hat of office. It was obvious that he was an official of the town.

The girl spoke. “Lady Heterodyne, this is Herr Wilhelm Diamant. He’s responsible for the transport and care of the prisoners in Castle Heterodyne.”

The old man ignored them and stepped close to examine Carson. “Did you people force him into this?”

The entity grinned. “Carson von Mekkhan came to me freely, Herr Diamant. He truly believes this girl is the new Heterodyne,” it chuckled. “Though he will never admit it.”

“That old fool,” Diamant snarled. “All the Heterodynes are dead!”

Suddenly Herr Diamant gave a shriek and Agatha saw him hoisted into the air by an assortment of clamp-like mechanical hands. Another set of manipulators, equipped with knives, many of them rusted but still quite sharp, swung into the light.

“You disloyal dog,” the entity hissed.

Diamant shuddered and stared at the entity in terror. “No! I—”

“Obviously it has been far too long since you felt the Masters’ displeasure!”

“Carson!” the old man moaned. “Call it off!”

The entity paused and then tittered. “I think you’ve annoyed him as well.” A blade lazily began to spin as it edged closer to the trapped man.

“STOP!”

Everyone jerked in surprise. The blade pulled back. Agatha strode forward and confronted the entity face-to-face. “I am here now, and I’m telling—No, I am ordering you to let him go!”

The entity inside Carson snarled. “You are not the Heterodyne yet!” The blade spun faster and aimed itself towards Herr Diamant’s eyes.

Agatha viciously slapped Carson across the face. “I say enough! I am the Heterodyne! You’ll do what I say now—because if you ignore me and hurt him—then I will walk out of this room and find another way to stop these people!” She leaned in. “But that will take time. Time you don’t have. They’ll shut you down and you’ll be dead, having utterly failed the Heterodyne family. Is that what you want?”

The effect of these last words was dramatic. The entity gasped as if punched and flinched at her final question.

“No,” it whispered.

“Then release him,” Agatha demanded.

The entity hesitated. “Can’t I just…wound him? Just a little?”

“No!”

The entity slammed Carson’s fist down in frustration. “Why not? He needs to be reminded who is his Master!”

Agatha wheeled about. “The only disloyal thing I see here is you! Release him at once!”

Carson huffed, “Fine! Have it your way!” With a snap, several manipulators opened and Diamant dropped to the floor. “Maybe I just won’t kill anyone at all! How would you like that?”

Agatha ignored it and bent to help the old man to his feet. “Are you all right, Herr Diamant?”

The old man stared at her and clasping her hands in his, awkwardly dropped to one knee. “I am your loyal servant until the end of days, my lady,” he declared fervently.

Behind them, the entity looked on with interest. Ah, an unusual variant upon the Old Game.²⁶

Agatha addressed Herr Diamant. “So you can get me inside the castle without attracting attention?”

Herr Diamant nodded. “Yes, my lady. Give me your measurements, and I’ll have a suitable set of clothes prepared for you. My cart is outside.” He glanced at the others. “I shall see to it that your companions are safely settled until—”

“Wait,” Zeetha interrupted, “We’re going in, too.”

“No!” the thing within Carson thundered. “The Heterodyne must enter alone!”

Wooster cleared his throat. “Allow to me point out, sir, that the rules of your game have already been negated. The false Heterodyne entered accompanied by a full complement of retainers. In the interest of parity…”

“Several of the usurper’s creatures are already dead,” the entity said with evident pride. “The rest will soon follow. The Heterodyne must enter alone!”

Krosp folded his arms. “Nuts to you, you overclocked music box. You’ll do what Agatha wants.”

“That’s right,” Agatha said. “And I say I’m going in alone.” This prompted an eruption of protest from everyone else, which was only silenced by the entity’s voice raised in argument, apparently with itself.

“No! I want to tell her! No, I’ll do it now. Now give it back! You never let me have any fun!” This ended with the seated figure gripping the metal helmet and wrenching it upwards. Carson gave a shriek of pain as the device slid free of his skull and several fresh rivulets of blood slid past his nose. The old man took a deep breath and then his eyes snapped open. A maniacal grin spread across his face.