Agatha H and the Voice of the Castle

Gil made an odd, angry face. “Heavens, yes. If I let everyone I thought was an idiot die, there wouldn’t be many people left.”

Zeetha thought about this and shivered. “Oh.”

Meanwhile, within the panel in the walls, the little clank had successfully resolved a problem involving force and pressure. It emerged, proud of itself, dragging a sliver of the stone wall.

“Ha!” Gil examined the rock chip. “I knew you could do it!” He put his eye up to the gap and examined the scene before him. “Yesss… That debris sheared right through the cable. We got everything else, so…” He turned to Zeetha. “Go wake up Higgs, Theo, Sleipnir, and Krosp. Quietly.”

“What for?”

“You’re leaving.”

“Oh really? How?”

Gil raised a finger. He set the little clank on his palm and addressed it directly. “I’m stuck here for a while but I want my friends to go find Agatha and help her. They can’t leave until we get that door open. You can do that. Follow those red cables to the left and you should be able to access the door mechanism.”

The little device stared at him and then tugged pointedly at the chain.

Gil continued. “I realize that the chain will be a problem. So it’s a question of trust.”

The little clank gave a drawn out clicking that sounded to Gil like a raspberry.

“You don’t like me? Fine.” Gil snapped open a hook and the chain came free. The little clank was all attention. “But this will help Agatha, if you do it quickly. Do you understand?”

The little clank lashed out and biffed Gil in the nose before leaping off his hand. Quick as a flash, it vanished back inside the huge mechanism inside the Castle wall.

Gil rubbed his nose and leaned in close to the opening. “Does that mean you’ll do it?” He turned to Zeetha and shrugged. “I’ll take that as a ‘maybe.’”

Zeetha nodded. “The others are up and moving. You’re really not coming?”

“No. Tiktoffen did a lot of talking tonight. Zola’s got…something. She thinks it will shut down the castle. That’s the last thing we want, so I’m going to find out what it is and disable it. Plus, Zola’s giving me more information than she thinks she is, so it’s worth keeping an eye on her.”

Zeetha smirked. “Old habits die hard, eh?”

“Yes, yes.” Gil paused. “Um…Look…when you see Agatha, please tell her…” Zeetha looked expectant. “Um…tell her I am…ah…anxious to speak to her so that we can overcome our mutual obstacles.”

Zeetha looked like she was experiencing actual physical pain. “No.”

“What?”

“That sounds moronic. Try again.”

Gil looked lost. “Um…Then…Then tell her that I’m pretty sure that I’m fond of her, and that if it’s mutual and she’s not too evil, perhaps we can—”

“NO!” This was delivered with a sharp slap to the side of Gil’s head.

“Ow! Why are you hitting me? I love her and I want to help her!”

Zeetha lowered her fist and smiled. “Now that I’ll pass along.”

Gil frowned. “But…that’s so imprecise!”

“I’m going to hit you again.”

“Hey!” Krosp tugged his trouser leg and pointed. “The door is opening!” He darted under the slowly rising gate and stuck his head back in. “It’s clear!”

“Get moving,” Zeetha told Theo and Sleipnir. “I need to get something.”

Airman Higgs ambled up to Gil and considered him for a moment. “Sure you don’t want me to stay with you, sir?” He jerked a thumb over to the remaining sleepers. “That lot might get kind of mad when they see we’re gone.”

Gil smiled. “Why, thank you, Mr. Higgs, I appreciate the offer. But this will work better for me if you’re all gone.”

“Okay.” Zeetha reappeared. “I’m all set. Let’s go.” She was wearing one of the long coats and tunics worn by Zola’s assistants.

“Where did you—?”

“Oh, I smacked goon number three with a wrench. I can get a guy undressed really fast.”

“Why would you risk—?”

“Cold.” Zeetha hoisted the edge of her tunic. “You wanna see these goosebumps?”

Gil’s face went scarlet. “No! Get going!”

Zeetha grinned and gave him an affectionate hug. “Good luck, kiddo.” And a moment later, she and the others were gone.

Gil rested a while, examining the exposed machinery of the wall. Really, all that was left was to repair that sheared cable. He selected a tool and reached into the wall, muttering to himself: “Okay, I just have to hook this end here…argh, this is tricky—onto this bit… and—” An electrical crackling split the air and a blinding flash of energy knocked him back several feet where he landed with a crash against the decorative metal wall panels that had been laid aside. Zola and all her men were instantly awake.

The Castle made an appreciative noise. Agatha looked up. “Ah! My Lady, I believe I have found your other young man.”

“How is he?”

“He appears to be slightly singed. Ah, but never fear, I see there are other young men as well. My my! I shall reopen the old harem quarters!”

“Not you, too! Will you please—” Agatha realized that the Castle was quietly chuckling. She paused. While mechanisms advanced enough to posses a sense of humor were extremely rare, they were not unheard of.⁶⁷

“Ha, ha,” she said, giving up. “Just keep them…contained until I get there. All right?”