A Pale View of Hills

Had Sachiko not been so peculiarly reluctant to talk about her uncle’s household, I doubt if it would have occurred to me to ponder such a topic. As it was, I grew curious, and despite Sachiko’s reticence I managed to gather certain impressions; for one thing, the uncle was not, it seemed, related by blood, but was a relative of Sachiko’s husband; Sachiko had never known him prior to arriving at his house several months earlier. The uncle was wealthy, and since his house was an unusually large one — and his daughter and a housemaid the only other occupants — there had been plenty of room for Sachiko and her little girl. Indeed, one thing Sachiko did mention more than once was her recollection of how large parts of that house had remained empty and silent.

In particular, I became curious about the uncle’s daughter, who I gathered to be an unmarried woman of roughly Sachiko’s age. Sachiko would say little about her cousin, but then I do recall one conversation we had around that time. I had by then formed an idea that Sachiko’s slowness in returning to her uncle had to do with some tension which existed between herself and the cousin. I must have tentatively put this to Sachiko that morning, for it provoked one of the few occasions upon which she talked explicitly about the time she had spent at her uncle’s house. The conversation comes back to me quite vividly; it was one of those dry windless mornings of mid-August, and we were standing on the bridge at the top of our hill, waiting for a tram to take us into the city. I cannot remember where it was we were going that day, or where we had left Mariko — for I recall the child was not with us. Sachiko was gazing out at the view from the bridge, holding up a hand to shield her face from the sun.

“It puzzles me, Etsuko,” she said, ‘how you ever managed to get hold of such an idea. On the contrary, Yasuko and I were the best of friends, and I’m greatly looking forward to seeing her again. I really don’t understand how you could have thought otherwise, Etsuko.”

“I’m sorry, I must have been mistaken,” I said. “For some reason, I supposed you had some reservations about returning there.”

“Not at all, Etsuko: When you first met me, it’s quite

true, I was in the process of considering certain other possibilities. But a mother can’t be blamed for considering the different options that arise for her child, can she? It just so happened that for a while there seemed an interesting option open to us. But having given it further consideration, I’ve now rejected it. That’s all there is to it, Etsuko, I’ve no further interest in these other plans that were suggested to me. I’m glad everything has turned out for the best, and I’m looking forward to returning to my uncle’s house. As for Yasuko-San, we have the highest regard for each other. I don’t understand what could have made you suppose otherwise, Etsuko.”

“I do apologize. It’s just that I thought you once mentioned a quarrel of some kind’

“A quarrel?” She looked at me for a second and then a smile spread over her face. “Oh, now I understand what you’re referring to. No Etsuko, that was no quarrel. That was just some trivial tiff we had. What was it about now? You see, I don’t even remember, it was so trivial. Oh yes, that’s right, we were arguing about which of us should prepare the supper. Yes, really, that’s all it was. You see, Etsuko, we used to take it in turns. The housemaid would cook one night, my cousin the next then it would be my turn. The housemaid was taken ill on one of her nights, and Yasuko and I both wanted to cook. Now you mustn’t misunderstand, Etsuko, we generally got on very well. It’s just that when you see so much of one person and no one else, things can get out of proportion at times,”

“Yes, Edo understand. I’m sorry, I was quite mistaken.”

“You see, Etsuko, when you have a housemaid to do all the little jobs for you, it’s surprising how slowly the time goes by. Yasuko and I, we tried to occupy ourselves one way or another, but really there was little to do other than sit and talk all day. All those months we sat in that house together, we hardiy saw an outsider the whole time. Its a wonder we didn’t really quarrel. Properly, I mean.’

“Yes, it certainly is. I obviously misunderstood you before.”

“Yes, Etsuko, I’m afraid you did. I only happen to remember the incident because it occurred just before we left and I haven’t seen my cousin since. But it’s absurd to call it a quarrel.” She gave a laugh. “In fact, I expect yasuko’s thinking of it and laughing too.”