CHAPTER 11
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“Okay, Rufus, it’s very important that you do exactly as I say.” Harriet gave the sheepdog a hard look, hoping her words would penetrate the big dog’s sluggish brain. “There’s a certain routine we need to nail down, and when I say nail, I do mean you’ll have to nail it if you want to stand a chance at winning that gold cup.”
“Gold cup?” said Rufus. “I thought being selected Best in Show came with a year’s supply of Dog Snax?”
“Yes, it does, but more importantly, you will take home that very beautiful and very coveted gold cup.”
Rufus gave her a look of confusion.“Now what do I want with a gold cup?”
“You can put it on your mantelpiece,” said Harriet, trying to hold onto her equanimity. Now she understood why all the dog trainers she’d seen on YouTube all looked old and gray. Dealing with dogs took a lot of patience, which was wearing really thin by now. “It’s all about the honor,” she said, when Rufus still didn’t get it. “You want to make your humans proud, don’t you?”
“Well, sure,” said Rufus.
“So? That cup will make Ted and Marcie very happy. They’ll be able to show it off to their friends and family.”
“And that’s what makes them happy? Being able to show off a gold cup?”
“Of course. Humans love to show off to other humans. It’s one of their favorite pastimes. They buy cars so they can show them off to the neighbors. Clothes to show off to their colleagues. Husbands to show off to their friends. Wives to show off to their golf buddies. That’s why they call it a trophy wife. Now let’s take it from the top. You have to jump over that hurdle, and make sure you don’t trip.”
They’d selected one of Ted’s hideous gnomes as a standin for the first hurdle in the concourse, and if Rufus managed to clear it in one go, he just might stand a chance. So far he hadn’t been able to, but they still had plenty of time. The competition was next Saturday, which should be a cinch… for a talented dog.
“Such a pity that Fifi couldn’t join us,” said Brutus, who was Harriet’s co-trainer. “It would have been nice if Rufus and Fifi could have trained together.”
“Fifi decided she didn’t need our services,” said Harriet with a touch of hauteur. “So if she doesn’t make it into the competition, it’s her own fault.”
“I know, but maybe one of us should go over there and try to talk to her again. It might give Rufus a boost. Just look how unhappy the big guy looks.”
They both eyed the big sheepdog with a critical eye, and Harriet had to admit her partner was correct: Rufus did look a little lethargic. Even as he approached the big gnome, his heart didn’t seem to be in it. And as he jumped, trying to clear the hurdle, once again he managed to topple the thing.
“You have to take a running leap!” Harriet yelled. “How many times do I have to tell you!” Shaking her head, she stalked over to her inept pupil, and proceeded to put the gnome upright again. “Yuck, it’s slimy,” she said as she quickly removed her paw from the monstrosity.
“It’s the snails,” said Rufus sadly. “They have been crawling all over the garden, sliming everything. It’s driving Ted and Marcie crazy.”
“Okay, let’s try again,” said Harriet, the fate of her neighbors’ backyard not of any concern to her. “And this time I want to see some energy! Some vigor!”
“Yes, Harriet,” said Rufus with a deep sigh, and slouched off to give it another shot.
No, his heart clearly wasn’t in it. And so with the quickness of decision that was typical of her, she decided that Brutus was right, and that Fifi had to be conciliated, whatever the cost.
“Brutus, better go and apologize to Fifi,” she said therefore. “And tell her to join us.”
“You want me to apologize?” said Brutus.
“Of course. I can’t apologize. I’m the trainer. And apologizing to a trainee would undermine my position. Whereas you are merely an assistant trainer, which means your role is to get in good with the trainees. Boost morale.”
“If you say so,” said Brutus dubiously.
“It’s a good cop, bad cop kind of situation,” she explained, seeing that her mate hadn’t fully grasped the concept. “Now get her over here. And quick, before I lose my patience!”
She watched Brutus toddle off, and shook her head. If she’d known how hard this training thing was going to be, she would never have accepted the position.
And as Rufus scratched his flank with one of his hind legs, trying to work out what he was doing wrong, Harriet’s keen ears picked up an interesting conversation taking place one backyard over.
“I can’t believe this,” Marge was saying. “Odelia cheating on Chase with Edward Dexter? It’s impossible.”
“And yet here’s the photographic evidence,” Tex said. “Our daughter, in the arms of that playboy billionaire.”
“But why? I thought she and Chase were so happy.”
“If there’s one thing I know, it’s that it’s very hard to know what goes on in other people’s marriages, honey. Odelia may look happy, but clearly she isn’t, otherwise she would never throw herself into the arms of another man like this.”