Zen and the Art of Vampires

"If it was Kristoff that killed you, he won't go unpunished," I told the empty room.

And if it was Alec? my inner critic asked. I moved toward the door, mentally shaking my head. It couldn't be Alec. I would know.

The bathroom door that led into my room wasn't locked. I sagged with relief for a moment before peeking inside. The room was dark. "Thank heavens for police who don't stay at a crime scene."

I was halfway into the room before the voice spoke.

"Not to mention women who just can't live without their things."

I gasped and whirled as the lights came on. Kristoff stood next to the bed, dressed entirely in black, the golden glow from the lamp casting sinister shadows across his face.

"What are you doing here?" I asked in a high, wavering voice. I started to back away from him but realized I had nowhere to go. There was no safety for a fugitive.

"Waiting for you. Alec had an idea you'd be back. I packed up your things."

I looked where he gestured. My large leather bag was sitting on a chair.

"Why are you following me?" I asked without thinking.

"Why did you run from me?" he countered.

"You killed a man! Right in front of me," I said.

"I killed a reaper," he corrected. "One who was about to kill you."

"He was not. He was just using me as a shield so you wouldn't bite him and turn him into the evil undead."

Kristoff adopted a martyred expression that for some reason, I found endearing. "Dark Ones are very much alive, and we do not turn people without a profound reason."

My eyes widened at his words. Until that moment, I wasn't sure what part of the vampire myth was true. "You mean you can turn people into vampires?"

"We can. It strips the soul from the person, so it is not done frequently. Certainly we are not building some sort of Dark One army to take over the world, if that's what you were about to ask."

I closed my mouth. I was, in fact, about to ask that very thing.

"Now, if there are no more ridiculously misinformed ideas you'd like debunked, I'd like to get going. The night is young, and I have much to do." He started toward me as he spoke.

"Don't you come near me." I said with rising panic, backing up and reaching around blindly for an object to use as protection.

He stopped, a mildly amused look on his face. "Why? What will you do? Call the police?"

My heart sank as I realized the veracity of his words. There was no one I could call to help me. Magda must be in her room by now, but I didn't really want to get her involved. Not with a vampire.

"I thought you wanted to see Alec. Or was your night with him so unmemorable?"

My spine stiffened at his mocking tone. "I do want to see him, not that the night I spent with him is any of your business. I have several things I'd like to ask him, not the least of which is why he felt it necessary to give you my passport."

"Come along, then," he said, opening the door to the hallway a smidgen. He closed it quickly. "We have to leave. Now."

"Is someone coming?" I asked, torn between a desire to seek help and a knowledge that I was better off without becoming involved with the police.

"Yes. Police. Evidently you aroused suspicion getting in here." He turned off the light, grabbed my suitcase, and flung open the French doors on the balcony.

"But no one saw me… unless the desk clerk caught a glimpse. Oy."

Kristoff didn't say anything, just leaped off the balcony. I followed, closing the French doors behind me, peering hesitantly down to the ground, where he stood waiting impatiently in the indigo shade cast by a nearby hedge. The midnight sun was still up, but at its lowest point, which left everything bathed in a lovely twilight glow.

Everything but the vampire glaring up at me. "Hurry. My car is parked a block away."

"It's a long jump down," I said softly, trying to gauge the distance between the ground and the balcony.

"I thought you said you jumped down this way earlier." Exasperation was beginning to make itself heard in his deep voice.

"Yes, but that was in the heat of the moment. I was scared and panicky. I'm not panicking now."

He muttered something that I suspected wasn't at all a good reflection on me, setting down the bag and holding his arms up. "Jump down and I'll catch you."

"You have got to be kidding."

His teal eyes glittered wickedly in the moonlight.

"I'm too big! I'll squash you flat," I pointed out.

"For god's sake, woman, jump now, or I'll leave you to the police."

I swung my legs over the railing, sitting on it for a moment as I tried to make up my mind.

Light filtered out from the curtains on the French door. Someone was in my room.

"I'll squash—" I started to say again.

"Jump!" he commanded, and I threw all caution to the wind and did just that.

"You see? I told you I was too heavy!" I looked down at Kristoff's face. As I suspected, I had toppled him like a bowling pin. He lay beneath me with a dazed look in his eyes that quickly faded to familiar irritation.

"All women think they're too fat. I am perfectly capable of catching you, regardless."