Wizard's First Rule

Zedd held a thin finger to Richard's chest. "The payment is that you suffer the pain of seeing in yourself all your own evil, all your own shortcomings, all the things we don't like to see in ourselves, or admit are there. And you see the good in the one you have killed, suffer the guilt for having done so." Zedd shook his head sadly. "Please believe me, Richard, the pain comes not only from yourself, but more importantly, from the magic, a very powerful magic, a very powerful pain. Do not underestimate it. It is real, and it punishes your body, as well as your soul. You saw it in Kahlan, and that was from killing a tree. If it had been a man, it would have been profound. This is why anger is so-important. Rage is the only armor you have against the pain; it gives' a measure of protection. The stronger the enemy, the stronger the pain. But the stronger the rage, the stronger the shield. It makes you care less about the truth of what you have done. In some cases enough to not feel the pain. This is why I said the terrible things I did to Kahlan, things that hurt, and filled her with rage. It was to protect her when she used the sword. You see why I wouldn't have allowed you to take the sword, if you weren't able to use your anger? You would be naked before the magic; it would tear you apart."

Richard was a little frightened by this, by the look in Kahlan's eyes after she had used the sword, but it didn't dissuade him. He glanced up at the mountains of the boundary. They stood out, pale pink in the light of the setting sun. Behind them, from the east, darkness was coming. Darkness coming for them. He had to find a way across the boundary, into that darkness. The sword would help him, that was what mattered. There was much at stake. There was a cost to everything in life; he would pay this one.

His old friend placed his hands on Richard's shoulders and looked hard into his eyes. Zedd's features were set in grim warning.

"Now I have to tell you something you are not going to like." His fingers tightened, almost painfully. "You cannot use the Sword of Truth on Darken Rahl."

"What!"

Zedd gave him a shake. "He is too powerful. The magic of Orden protects him during the year of search. If you try to use the sword, you will be dead before it reaches him."

"This is crazy! First you want me to be the Seeker and take the sword, now you tell me I can't use it!" Richard was furious. He felt cheated.

"Just against Rahl, it won't work against him! Richard, I didn't make the magic, I only know how it works. Darken Rahl knows how it works too. He may try to make you use the sword against him. He knows it would kill you. If you give in to the rage and use the sword against him, he will win. You will be dead and he will have the boxes."

Kahlan's brow wrinkled in frustration. "Zedd, I agree with Richard. This makes it impossible. If he cannot use his most important weapon, then…"

Zedd cut her off. "No! This"-he rapped Richard on the head with his knuckles-"this is a Seeker's most important weapon." He jabbed his long finger at the center of Richard's chest. "And this."

Everyone stood in silence for a moment.

"The Seeker is the weapon," Zedd said with emphasis. "The sword is just a tool. You can find another way. You must."

Richard thought he should be upset, that he should feel angry, frustrated, overwhelmed, but he didn't. His first view of his options lifted from him, letting him see beyond. He felt strangely calm and determined.

"I'm sorry, my boy. I wish I could change the magic, but I…"

Richard put his hand on Zedd's shoulder. "It's all right, my friend. You're right. We must stop Rahl. That's all that matters. I have to know the truth to succeed, and you have given me the truth. Now it's up to me to use it. If we gain one of the boxes, justice will have Rahl. I don't need to see it. I need only know it is done. I said I wouldn't be an assassin, and so I shall not be. The sword will be invaluable, I'm sure, but as you said, it's only a tool, and that's the purpose I will put it to. The magic of the sword isn't an end in itself. I can't allow myself to make that mistake, or I will be only a pretend Seeker."

In the gathering gloom, Zedd patted Richard affectionately on the shoulder. "You have gotten it all right, my boy. All of it." He broke into a broad grin. "I have chosen the Seeker well. I am proud of myself." Richard and Kahlan laughed at Zedd's self-congratulation.

Kahlan's smiled faded. "Zedd, I cut down the tree you planted in memory of your wife. That bothers me. I'm deeply sorry for doing it."

"Don't be, dear one, her memory has aided us. She has helped show the Seeker the truth, there could be no more fitting tribute to her."