Wizard's First Rule

"You have misinterpreted the context of what I said. I said I killed because I thought I had to, that I thought his intent was to kill her, therefore I thought I had to act or she would die. Not that my intent equates to the deed. There is probably a long list of people who, at one time or another, I have wanted to kill."

"If you wanted to, why have you not done so?"

"Many reasons. For some, I had not true justification, it was only a mind game, a fantasy, to counter the sting of an injustice. For some, though I felt justified, I was able to escape without killing. Some, well, it just turned out that I didn't that's all."

"The five elders?"

Richard sighed. "Yes."

"But you intended to.»

Richard didn't answer.

"Is this a case where the intent is as the deed?"

Richard swallowed hard. "In my heart, yes. That I intended it wounds me almost as much as the deed would have."

"So then we have not, it would seem, gotten what you said entirely out of context.»

Kahlan could see tears in Richard's eyes. "Why are you asking me these questions!"

"Why do you want the object of magic?"

"To stop Darken Rahl!"

"And how will getting this object stop him?"

Richard leaned back a little. His eyes went wide. He understood. A tear ran down his cheek. "Because, if I can get the object, and keep it from him," he whispered, "he will die. I will kill him in that way."

"What you are really asking us, then, is, for our aid in killing another." There voices echoed around her in the darkness.

Richard only nodded.

"That is why we are asking you these questions. You are asking for our aid in killing. Do you not think it fair we should know what kind of person it is we would be helping in his attempt to kill?" Sweat was rolling off Richard's face. "I guess so." He closed his eyes.

"Why do you want to kill this man?"

"Many reasons."

"Why do you want to kill this man?"

"Because he tortured and killed my father. Because he has tortured and killed many others. Because he will kill me if I don't kill him. Because he will torture and kill many more if I don't kill him. It is the only way to stop him. He cannot be reasoned with. I have no option but to kill him."

"Consider the next question carefully. Answer with the truth, or this gathering will end."

Richard nodded.

"What is the reason, above all others, why you want to kill this man?"

Richard looked down and closed his eyes again. "Because," he whispered at last, tears running down his face, "if I don't kill him, he will kill Kahlan."

Kahlan felt as if she had been hit in the stomach. She could barely bring herself to translate the words. There was a long silence. Richard sat naked, in more ways than one. She was angry at the spirits for doing this to him. She was also deeply distraught by what she was doing to him. Shar had been right.

"If Kahlan were not a factor, would you still try to kill this man?»,

"Absolutely. You asked the reason above all others. I told you."

"What is the object of magic you seek?" they asked suddenly.

"Does that mean you agree with my reasons for killing?"

"No. It means that for our own reasons, we have decided to answer your question. If we can. What is the object of magic you seek?»

"One of the three boxes of Orden."

When Kahlan translated, the spirits suddenly howled as if in pain. "We are not allowed to answer that question. The boxes of Orden are in play. This gathering is over.»

The elders' eyes began to close. Richard jumped to his feet. "You would let Darken Rahl kill all those people when you have the power to help?" "Yes.»

"You would let him kill your descendants? Your living flesh and blood? You aren't spirit ancestors to our people, you are spirit traitors!"

"Not true.»

"Then tell me!"

"Not allowed.»

"Please! Don't leave us without your help. Let me ask another question?"

"We are not allowed to disclose where the boxes of Orden are. It is forbidden. Think, and ask another question.»

Richard sat down, pulling his knees up. He rubbed his eyes with the tips of his fingers. The symbols painted all over him made him look like some kind of wild creature. He put his face in his hands, thinking. His head snapped up.

"You can't tell me where the boxes are. Are there any other restrictions?"

"Yes.»

"How many boxes does Rahl already have?"

"Two.»

He looked at the elders evenly. "You have just disclosed where two of the boxes are. That is forbidden," he reminded them. "Or maybe it is simply a gray shade of intent?"

Silence.

"That information is not restricted. Your question?"

Richard leaned forward like a dog on scent. "Can you tell me who knows where the last box is?"

Richard already knew the answer to this question, she suspected. She recognized his manner of slicing the loaf the other way.

"We know the name of the person who has the box, and the names of several other people nearby, but we cannot tell you the names because that would be the same as telling you where it is. That is forbidden.»