Titans of Chaos

Vanity said, "Do what? What is going on? Is today just official Everybody-Picks-on-Vanity day?"

I said to Quentin, "A magician never reveals her secrets!"

Colin said, "This isn't funny! You're all going mad as March bunnies! And someone is going to tellme what is going on! I have a right to know!"

I stood up, giving Colin a cold and haughty look: "No! No you don't! You have a right to obeyorders, which you never do, even though the rest of us do! It is damn hard to be leader, and I don'tlike it, and I am tired of you trying to make my job harder! So you don't get to know! And stopcalling for votes and stop undercutting my authority, or I actually Will take a riding crop to yourbutt and I will enjoy it and you won't!"

Colin stepped back, amazed by my outburst.

Vanity raised her hand. "Don't I get to know? I promise to be good. Oh, pul-eese! You've got totell me what's going on!"

I said, "Well, okay. But you were disobedient, too. You should have run away and left me when Itold you to. Come here."

I leaned and whispered in her ear.

Vanity actually giggled. "Oh, that is so obvious! Oh, that is funny, isn't it?"

Colin said, "What? What?"

I said, "Today is hereby declared official Everybody-Picks-on-Colin day! The Dark Mistress hasspoken!"

Colin muttered, "And this is different from every other day how, again, exactly?"

Twenty minutes later, with the dawn sun appearing on the horizon ahead, we heard a shrillhorn-call pass from ship to ship, and banners rose in signal on the huge battle barges on thehorizon astern of us. The speeding black ships curveted and turned port and starboard, leavingtrails of foam hissing in the waters, like the palm-tree decorations in an Egyptian temple, parallellines suddenly spreading and curving left and right.

The forces of Mavors fell astern and were lost.

I spread my hands and said, "Ta-da!"

Colin got down on one knee. "Please tell me. This is torture."

I said, "Maybe I want to torture you, little boy! The Catwoman brooks no defiance from herhenchmen! The torture will continue until you learn how to hench when it is henching time!"

He clasped his hands in prayer: "Okay, okay. I'll be good, up until the moment you are no longerleader. Then I am going to find some excuse, I swear to God, to do a Boggin on you. Anopportunity will come. I know it. You'll create one. But I am sorry I disobeyed, I won't do it again;I will be good! May I never see you half-naked again if I am forsworn of this oath! Please tell mewhat the hell just happened?"