Time for Silence

“We have been so worried,” she said. “I have scarcely slept since war was declared. And you out there…in Belgium of all places, with the Germans sweeping across the country. Oh, yes, we were sick with worry, your father and I…although he didn’t show it as much as I did. We can’t be grateful enough to your Uncle Gerald, who said he would get you out the best way. I wanted to come, but he said that was ridiculous and impossible. So he sent that charming major. What a pleasant man!”

“Yes,” I said. “Everyone liked him. He was so imperturbable.”

“God bless him.”

“I must explain to you about these people with us. Do you mind their coming here?”

She looked at me in astonishment. “My darling, I’d welcome anyone who came with you. It’s all I care about…to have you back. But who are they? I know Miss Carruthers, of course. I mean the girl with the baby.”

“First the baby. I’ve got to keep him. I promised his mother. You see, she was dying…”

I told her how I had visited Edouard, how Marguerite had lost her own child and become foster-mother to Edouard. She listened intently as I described the scene with Marguerite when she was dying.

“I’ve got to look after him, Mama. I could never be happy if I didn’t,” I finished.

She understood perfectly. She said, “It’s a big undertaking. Poor little mite…without a mother.”

“She loved him so much. He took the place of her own child.”

“Yes, I see.”

“But he will stay here, won’t he? He must not become one of those babies for whom a home has to be found.”

“He has already been that once, poor lamb.”

“I don’t want it to happen again.”

“Don’t worry about the child. It will be impossible for you to adopt him at your age. But we’ll see to him. Poor little refugee. I wish these people who make wars would pause a while first to think of the misery they are causing.”

“The only thing they think about is power and they don’t care who suffers if they can get that. But Edouard will be all right here.”

“Edouard? That’s his name, is it? We’ll call him Edward. That will go down better here.”

I hugged her. She had reacted to the baby just as I had known she would.

“I thought,” she said, “that his mother was that Andrée.”

“Oh, no. We found her in an inn just over the border between Belgium and France. Her home was blown up, her parents killed, and she was on her way to an aunt whom she loathes. She wants to get work here. I thought we could help her. She’s very good with babies.”

“You have brought home some problems with you, my darling. And you not yet out of the schoolroom! You’re something of a manipulator…but I love you for it, and I’m deliriously happy because I’ve got you back.”

“And then there is Miss Carruthers. She is quite different from what I thought her. At school she was indomitable…really formidable, and now I realize that she is just a little frightened about the future.”

“I’ve known governesses like that. They wonder what will happen to them when they can no longer teach.”

“It seems there’s a cousin who lets her know she’s living on her bounty. It must be horrible. I know she would love to stay here for a few days.”

“I can see no reason why she shouldn’t. She came with you all the way and that makes her a rather special person to me.”

“How lucky I am to have you and Papa instead of a horrible old cousin and an aunt like Andrée’s. Tell me about Robert.”

“He’s been very worried about you. We’ll have to let him know at once that you are safely home. He joined up right at the start, and of course he couldn’t get away. On the first opportunity he’ll be here, you see.”

“Robert a soldier…how strange that seems!”

“I think we are going to find lots of strange things happening in the next months. But at the moment all I care about is that you are home.”

At that moment the door opened and my father came in. He did not speak but put his arms around me and held me tightly. He stroked my hair. “We are so pleased that you have come back to us,” was all he said. It was a wonderful homecoming.

The next day was given over to frenetic planning. My mother threw herself into this with an almost maniacal energy. She kept telling me how thankful she was that I was home and of the terrible anxiety they had suffered, of her wild imaginings as to what was happening. “I never want to go through that again,” she said more than once.

“Our first concern,” she went on, “must be the baby.” The nursery was to be opened up. The servants were delighted. They cooed over Edouard—Edward as he had now become—and he was clearly delighted with the attention.

“Poor little mite,” said Mrs. Cherry. “His home blown up by them Germans. I’d blow them up if I had my way. You’d think they’d have some pity for a helpless little baby. It’s a good thing we’re going to show them what’s what.”

“We’ll have to get a nanny,” said my mother. “In the meantime, Andrée will stay and help. I must say Edward seems to have taken a fancy to her…almost as much as he has for you.”