The Twist of a Knife

Jordan frowned. ‘No. My ethnicity has never been an issue for me. I’m very disconnected from my tribe. Jayne, my wife, was born in Huddersfield. I have two children with British passports. And in all this, I have had to consider the feelings of my adoptive parents. It may be that they felt a residue of guilt when they considered what they had done. When I was fifteen, Congress passed the Indian Child Welfare Act, which was designed to prevent any further adoptions such as mine – not, incidentally, that it succeeded. They never said as much, but I could tell that they were unhappy about my looking back, searching for my roots, as it were. They discouraged me from visiting the Rosebud Reservation. I have never been there. There are some who might criticise me for this, but I owe Harry and Lisbeth a great deal. Despite the distance between us, we are still very close. They’re elderly now … both in their late eighties. I have honoured them by trying to be what they want me to be, even if that is not entirely what I am.’

He stopped and turned back to the mirror, as if he was aware that he had been talking too much.

‘Did you find Mindgame easy to do?’ Hawthorne asked.

‘Acting is never easy, Mr Hawthorne. I always say that if it’s easy, something is very much amiss. It’s an act of self-sacrifice, pulling the character from inside you. It can be painful. But that is how it should be.’

‘I was thinking about the violence at the end of Act One. And in most of Act Two.’

‘It’s not real. You surely can’t believe that it in any way connects me with what happened to Harriet Throsby.’

‘People can be violent without knowing what they’re doing.’ Hawthorne paused. ‘For example, during rehearsals I understand you hurt Sky Palmer.’

‘Did she tell you that?’

‘It’s no secret.’

Of course, I was the one who’d told Hawthorne what I’d seen. Just for once, he’d been considerate enough not to name me.

Jordan drew in a breath and I saw his hand, which had been lying flat on the make-up table, curl into a fist. ‘I am not a violent person, Mr Hawthorne, despite what you may have heard. That business with the cake, for example. I was just letting off steam. I had just read an unpleasant review and I overreacted. I do that sometimes. But if you really think I was planning to kill her, do you think I would have announced it in front of the entire company?’

Hawthorne didn’t reply.

‘As for Sky, that happened at the end of a long and tiring day. I had things on my mind. I’ll admit that there are times when I don’t know my own strength. We were rehearsing the scene where Styler and I have to tie the nurse to a chair. I had done it many, many times on the road without any issues, but just for once I suppose I lost concentration. I gripped her too tightly and I left bruises on her arms. Of course, I was mortified. Sometimes, the role, the created truth, can consume the actor. Have you read Stanislavski? That’s what happened for just a few brief seconds.’

‘You’re lucky it wasn’t Julius Caesar. There’d have been blood everywhere.’

Jordan ignored this. ‘I wrote her a note and I brought her flowers. I thought the incident had been forgiven and forgotten. I’m sorry to hear otherwise.’

‘Nobody’s complained about you, Jordan,’ I said hastily.

‘I’m glad to hear that. I’ve enjoyed my experience with Mindgame and from the start I’ve considered this to be a very happy company.’

‘Tell us about the others.’ Hawthorne had moved on. He was being positively genial now. ‘I’d be interested to know what you think of them.’

‘You mean – the other actors?’

‘Yes.’

‘As performers?’

‘As potential killers.’

‘That’s ridiculous.’ Jordan was more certain of himself now. ‘Sky Palmer is a dear, sweet girl. Tirian is a bit of a cold fish, but then he only joined the company for the London run and I haven’t had a chance to get to know him well.’

‘I’m told there were difficulties between you.’

‘Someone has been doing a lot of telling where this production is concerned.’ Jordan turned to the mirror and his reflection glanced accusingly at me. ‘Tirian Kirke is a young actor who is just finding his feet and I think it’s significant that he’s had no formal training – which is to say, he did not attend drama school.’

‘What difference does that make?’

‘It makes a great deal of difference, although I would find it difficult to explain to someone who is not in the profession, particularly …’ he looked at his watch ‘… as we have so little time. Let us just say that he is not entirely giving as a performer. Movement on the stage is a symphony. One actor has to be aware of the others. It’s all about eye contact, about empathy, about heart. Tirian will learn in time, I’m sure, but he still has a long way to go.’

‘He’s just got a part in a big Hollywood movie.’

‘We all know about that, Mr Hawthorne. He never tires of telling us.’

‘Do you get on with Ewan Lloyd?’