The Ranch

“I'm impressed,” he said, managing to look both very handsome and extremely lofty. There had always been something very arrogant about him, and Zoe suspected that was what appealed to her, there was an irresistible desire to tame him. But until the present, in any case, she had controlled it. “Do you do that often?” He indicated the game she was playing with Jade, where she built a large pink house of Lego blocks, and Jade destroyed it.

“As often as I can,” she said honestly, knowing full well that it made him uncomfortable. He had confessed to her long since that he felt uneasy around children. He had never had any of his own, and like her, he had never been married. He claimed that the opportunity had never presented itself to him at the right time, but she sensed fairly accurately that he was basically too self-centered. “Would you like to play?” she teased, she couldn't imagine him on his hands and knees on the floor, playing anything. He might mess up his hair, or uncrease his trousers. She knew that most of her contemporaries thought he was a stuffed shirt, and he was in a way, but he was so incredibly smart, and at fifty-five, he was extremely attractive. On the surface he was the kind of man her family would have liked her to marry years before, but her parents were long dead, and it seemed exotic enough to her just to date him.

“Are you ready?” he asked expectantly, not particularly amused to be watching her play with Jade. He had gotten tired of it in less than a minute. And their reservation at Boulevard was at eight, and it was quite a distance from Edgewood, and so popular they didn't like holding tables, even for important doctors.

“Ready, sir,” she said, shrugging into a little velvet jacket. Even in June, it was cold at night in San Francisco, and she looked very pretty as she picked Jade up again and kissed her.

“I love you, little mouse,” she said, rubbing noses with her, and then giving her a butterfly kiss on the cheek with her eyelashes as the little girl giggled. “I'll see you later.” As she said the words, Jade's lower lip began to stick out, and Zoe could see instantly that tears were about to happen. She gave her quickly to the au pair, and waved just as Jade let out a wail, but by then they were out the door, and the au pair turned her around to distract her. In the past year, Zoe had become the master of the fast exit.

“You do that very well,” he said admiringly. It was very unusual for him to go out with women with young children. Most of the time he preferred women who were too involved in their careers to marry or have kids, which was exactly what Zoe had been when he met her. And then she had stunned him by adopting a baby. It hadn't been at all what he'd expected of her, and it had somehow altered their relationship, but he still found her agonizingly attractive, and he would have liked to spend a lot more time with her. But she was too busy with her practice most of the time, and now with the child, so he did the best he could, and accepted crumbs from her table. “I haven't seen you in two weeks,” he complained as he started his dark green Jaguar.

“I've been busy,” she said simply. “I have a lot of very sick patients,” she said matter-of-factly. She had lost several of late, and it had been very depressing for her because she always got so close to them, particularly in the end, when it was always so touching, and so pathetic.

“I have very sick patients too,” he said, sounding mildly irritated, as he headed toward downtown, and through the Haight just below her.

“Yes, but you have partners.”

“True. You ought to think about that some time. I don't see how you manage the way you do. You're going to get sick one of these days, a bad case of hepatitis, or worse yet, get AIDS from one of your patients.”

“That's a pleasant thought,” she said, looking away from him, out the window.

“It happens,” he said seriously, “you should think about what you're doing. There's no point being a hero, or a martyr.”

“I have thought about it, and this is where I belong. They need me, Dick.”

“So does everyone else. So does your daughter. You need to take more time off.” He was the second person who had told her that that night, and she glanced over at him, wondering why he had said it. He wasn't usually that solicitous, or that concerned. He wasn't much of a nurturer, although he was a doctor. “You look tired, Zoe,” he said simply, and then he patted her hand with a smile. “A nice dinner out will do you good. You probably never eat either.” She couldn't even remember if she'd had breakfast or lunch that day, she had hit the deck running the moment she got to the office. Most of her days were like that.