The pillars of creation

"Sister Perdita, you have no conception of how much I wish to kill Richard Rahl." Jennsen's hands fisted at her sides. "He ordered the murder of my mother. She died in my arms. His rule resulted in Emperor Jagang nearly being killed. Richard is responsible for hurting Sebastian! For suffering beyond any imagining! For murders beyond estimate! I want Richard Rahl dead!"

"Then let us free the voice."

Jennsen stepped back in shock. "What?"

"Grushdeva.»

Jermsen's eyes went wide at encountering that word aloud.

"Where did you hear that?"

A self-satisfied smirk settled comfortably on Sister Perdita's face. "From you, dear."

"I never-"

"At dinner with His Excellency. He asked you why it was you wished to kill your brother, what was your reason, your purpose. You said Grushdeva.»

"I never said any such thing."

The smirk soured to condescension. "Oh, but you did. Are you going to lie to me? To deny that word has been whispered in your mind?" When Jennsen stood silent, Sister Perdita went on. "Do you know what it means? That word, Grushdeva?"

"No," Jennsen said in a very small voice.

"Vengeance."

"How do you know?"

"I know that tongue."

Jennsen stood rigid, her shoulders drawn up. "What is it, exactly, you are proposing?"

"Why, I'm proposing to save Sebastian's life."

"But, what else?"

Sister Perdita shrugged. "Some of us Sisters will take you out to a quiet place, where we can be alone, while some of us stay here and save Sebastian's life, like you want. In the morning, he will be better, and then you and he can be on your way to kill Richard Rahl. You came here for our help. I am proposing to give you that help. With what we do for you, you will be able to accomplish your task."

Jermsen swallowed. The voice was strangely silent. Not a word. It was somehow more awful that it was silent, right then.

"Sebastian is dying. He has only moments before it will be too late for us to save him. Yes, or no, Jennsen Rahl?"

" But, what if-"

"Yes, or no! Your time has run out. If you want to kill Richard Rahl, if you want to save Sebastian, then utter but one word. Do it now, or forever wish you had."

CHAPTER 52

After they picketed their horses, Jennsen gave Rusty a rub on the forehead. With trembling fingers, she smoothed her other hand along the underside of the jaw as she pressed the side of her face against the horse's nose.

"Be a good girl until I get back," she whispered.

Rusty neighed softly in response to the gentle words. Jennsen liked to imagine that the horse could understand her words. From the way her goat, Betty, had always cocked her head and stilled her little upright tail as Jennsen confided her innermost fears, she had firmly believed that her hairy four-legged friend could understand every word.

Jennsen peered overhead at the clawlike branches swaying in the muted light of a full moon occulted by a milky veil of ethereal clouds drifting across the sky, as if gathering to bear silent witness.

"Are you coming?"

"Yes, Sister Perdita."

"Hurry, then. The others will be waiting."

Jennsen followed the woman up the side of a bank. The mossy ground was littered with leathery dried oak leaves and a layer of small branches. Roots emerging here and there from the loose loam provided enough footing to climb the steep rise. At the top, the ground leveled out, The Sister's dark gray dress made her nearly vanish as she moved into the thick brush. For a woman with such big bones, Jermsen noticed that the Sister moved with disturbing grace.

The voice remained silent. In tense times like this the voice always whispered to her. Now it was silent. Jennsen had always wanted the voice to leave her be. She had come to understand just how frightening such silence could be.

The full moon, being only thinly obscured, provided enough light to make their way. Jermsen could see her breath in the cold air as she followed the Sister into the thick of the woods back between the low spreading boughs of balsams and spruce. She had always felt at home in the woods, but, somehow, following a Sister into the woods didn't give her the same comforting feeling.

She would rather be alone than in the company of the stem woman. Ever since Jennsen had given her the only word that would save Sebastian's life, Sister Perdita had settled into a demeanor of blunt superiority devoid of any tolerance. She was now firmly in command, and was certain that Jennsen knew it.

At least she had kept her word. As soon as Jennsen had given hers, Sister Perdita had urgently set other Sisters to saving Sebastian's life. While other Sisters were sent on ahead to prepare whatever it was they had to prepare, Jermsen was allowed to briefly look in on Sebastian to reassure her that everything possible to save him was being done.