The Last Samurai

I did not have a lot of money, so I walked up and down trying to think of a way to get to London or Paris or Rome. At last I went into the Kansas Fried Chicken.

I was just about to order a Kansas Chik’n Bucket when I remembered that I had signed up for dinner in college. My college was famous for its chef, and yet I was tempted to stay where I was, and if only—

I won’t think that. I don’t mean that, but if only—

What difference does it make? What’s done is done.

By coincidence I had signed up to eat in college that night; by coincidence I sat by a former member who was visiting; it was no coincidence that I talked of intellectual monogamy & of work permits since I could think of nothing else, but by coincidence this former member said sympathetically that Balthus had been the secretary of Rilke, by coincidence she was the daughter of a civil servant & so not intimidated by British bureaucracy, & she said that if I could bear the shame of being known to

Why are they fighting?

WHY ARE THEY FIGHTING?

WHY ARE THEY FIGHTING?

Can’t you read what it says?

Of COURSE I can read it but WHY

Well they’re looking for samurai to defend the village from bandits

I know that

but some of them think it’s a waste of time

I know THAT

because the samurai they’ve asked have been insulted by the offer of three meals a day

I KNOW that

and now they’re saying I told you so

I KNOW THAT BUT WHY ARE THEY FIGHTING

I think this may be too hard for you.

NO

Maybe we should wait till you’re older

NO

Just till you’re 6

NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!

OKOKOKOKOK. OK. OK.

I think he is probably too young but what can I do? Today I read these terrible words in the paper:

In the absence of a benevolent male, the single mother faces an uphill battle in raising her son. It is essential that she provide the boy with male role models—neighbours, or uncles, or friends of the family, to share their interests and hobbies.

This is all very well but Ludo is an uncleless boy, and I don’t happen to know any well-meaning stamp collectors (if I did I would do my best to avoid them). It’s worrying. I once read that Argentine soldiers tied up dissidents and took them up in planes over the sea and threw them out. I thought: well, if L needs a role model let him watch Seven Samurai & he will have 8.

The farmers see a crowd of people. A samurai has gone to the river’s edge to be shaved by a monk.

A man with a moustache and a sword pushes his way through the crowd and squats scratching his chin. (It’s Toshiro Mifune.)

A handsome, aristocratic young man asks someone what’s happening. A thief is hiding in a barn. He is holding a baby hostage. The samurai has asked for monk’s robes and two rice cakes.

The samurai puts on his disguise. He feels Mifune watching and turns. His eyes are black in a white face on a black screen. Mifune stares blankly back. The samurai’s eyes are black in a white face. Mifune scratches himself. The samurai turns away. He turns back and looks at Mifune; his eyes are black his face is white. He turns away and goes to the barn.

Mifune sits on a stump close behind him to watch.

The samurai tells the thief he has brought food, tosses the rice cakes through the door, and follows.

The thief runs from the barn and falls down dead.

The samurai drops the thief’s sword in the dirt.

The parents of the child rush forward to take it.

Mifune runs forward brandishing his sword. He jumps up and down on the body.

The samurai walks off without a backward look.

type (I had admitted to 100wpm) I could have a work permit & a job.