The Heckler

Raskin went back to the loft on Culver Avenue where Margarita was packing their stock preparatory to the move, flinging her unbound breasts about with renewed fervor. Raskin watched her for a few moments, pleased with what he saw. The telephone rang suddenly. Still watching Margarita’s energetic acrobatics, Raskin picked up the receiver.

“Hello?” he said.

“Raskin?” the voice asked.

“Yes? Who’s this?”

“Get out of that loft,” the voice said. “Get out of that loft, you son of a bitch, or I’ll kill you!”

“You!” Raskin said. “You again!”

And suddenly he heard chuckling on the other end of the wire.

“Who’s this?” he asked.

“Meyer Meyer,” the voice said, chuckling.

“You dirty bastard,” Raskin said, and then he began laughing, too. “Oh, you had me going there for a minute. For a minute, I thought my heckler was back.” Raskin laughed uproariously. “I got to hand it to you. You’re a great comedian. Since your father died, there hasn’t been such a comedian. You’re just like your father! Just like him!”

Meyer Meyer, at the other end of the wire, listened, exchanged the amenities, and then hung up.

Just like my father,he thought.

Suddenly, he felt a little ill.

“What’s the matter?” Miscolo said, coming in from the Clerical Office.

“I don’t feel so hot,” Meyer said.

“You’re just upset because a patrolman cracked a case you couldn’t.”

“Maybe so,” Meyer answered.

“Cheer up,” Miscolo said. “You want some coffee?”

“Just like my father,” Meyer said sadly.

“Huh?”

“Nothing. But a guy works all his life trying to…” Meyer shook his head. “Just like my father.”

“You want the coffee or not?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll have the coffee. Stop heckling me!”

“Who’s heckling?” Miscolo said, and he went out for the coffee.

From his desk across the squadroom, Bert Kling said, “It’ll be summer soon.”

“So?”

“So there’ll be more kids in the streets, and more gang wars, and more petty crimes, and shorter tempers and—”

“Don’t be so pessimistic,” Meyer said.

“Who’s pessimistic? It sounds like it’ll be a lovely summer. Just lovely.”

“I can hardly wait,” Meyer answered.

He pulled a typewritten list closer to the phone, and then dialed the first of a group of eyewitnesses to a burglary.

Outside the squadroom, May seemed impatient for the suffocating heat of July and August.

This is the twelfth published novel of the 87th Precinct. If I may, I would like to offer my sincere gratitude at this time to Herbert Alexander, who has worked with me on this series from the time it was conceived, and whose editorial suggestions have never failed to stimulate my imagination and enlarge my original concept. Thank you, Herb.

E.McB.

Afterword

WAY BACK WHEN—early in 1959, it must have been—I was still married to a woman whose maiden name was Anita Melnick. Her father’s name was Harry Melnick, to whom this book is dedicated. He’s dead now, but he got a big kick out of the book when it was first published. I hope my former wife enjoys it as much now. Memories don’t come cheap, you know.

Harry used to own a women’s dress shop on West 14th Street in New York City. All at once, most of the things that happen to Dave Raskin in these pages started happening to my father-in-law. Eventually, all the pranks stopped. Harry never found out who had targeted him for all the practical jokes. Nor was there a bank under his loft. But he had provided me with an idea—and the springboard for a new character.

Before I wroteThe Heckler , eleven 87th Precinct novels had already been published. We were trying to establish a new series, you see. A rule of thumb for any new mystery series is that if you haven’t hit the bestseller list after five tries, go hang up your sweat-pants, Gertie.

I wrote the first three books of the series in 1956, and the next two in 1957. By my count, that came to five books—and still no bestseller. Maybe because they were still being published as paperback originals. I don’t think there evenwas a paperback bestseller list back then. Progress, lads, progress!

The first book published in 1958 was also a paperback original. But withKiller’s Wedge that same year, Simon and Schuster brought out the first of the books in hardcover. It startled the entire civilized world! I jest, Maude. It would take a long, long time before one of the Eight-Sevens hit theNew York Times bestseller list. So much for rules of thumb about mystery series. And, besides, who’s counting?