The Heavenly Host

It was now Edwyrd’s turn to blink in surprise. “Wow, I am impressed. Very few people remember anything about the D’Orcs or Mount Doom!” He was grinning from ear to ear and chuckling. “You continue to amaze me, Gastropé!”

“How...? What...?” Gastropé was having trouble thinking or speaking.

“Long story. We’ll have plenty of time to go over it. Short part is, I screwed up on making plans for returning my guests home after the party, and that’s why we needed your help!”

“Party?” Gastropé was not following this. Or was he? He was seriously terrified that he was following all of this way more than he wanted to.

Edwyrd nodded, even as another older, female orc in ornate clothing stepped through the portal. “Yeah, that’s why my people were here shopping. They were picking up supplies for the party after the swearing-in ceremony!”

Another orc, this one male, stepped through the portal; he too was dressed ornately, like the other two orcs.

“Ceremony?” Gastropé somehow managed to spit out.

“Yeah. I just took over this place called Mount Doom.” Edwyrd waved the large staff around. It appeared have a metal demon head at the top. “Came with a whole bunch of mighty warriors, D’Orcs. Anyway, we had a swearing-in ceremony for them to pledge their loyalty to me.”

“Ohh-kay,” was all Gastropé could manage before he felt the ground suddenly attack him.

∼

Jenn was waiting in line to fill a bucket of water from the wargtown well when an orc behind her bellowed out, “Hilda! You have returned! It is my turn to buy you a drink!” Her first thought was that it was odd to hear an orc speak perfect trade tongue. All the orcs she had spoken to sounded very brutish and barbaric, so it was strange to hear one speak without an accent. The second thing was the name “Hilda,” particularly in the context of drinking.

The next voice left Jenn blinking furiously.

“Toothsetter!” Hilda — Trisfelt’s Hilda — said. “Good to see you again! I have an errand to run yet, but I will be back a bit later and we can drink!”

Jenn turned to see Hilda, the same Hilda from Freehold, standing not ten feet away from her. She was carrying a picnic basket and was with a group of humans. Or humans and a relatively good-looking, skinny orc. On third thought, humans, skinny orc and a metal something.

“Hilda? What are you doing here?” Jenn asked, startled.

Hilda glanced at her, and then glanced again. “Jenn? What are you doing here?” Hilda was clearly as startled to see her as Jenn was to see Hilda.

The metal creature with Hilda was behaving very strangely. “I can sense him. There is a portal!” Suddenly the metal man-thing took off running extremely fast towards the north.

“What the...?” Jenn asked, looking after the charging metal creature. Hilda and the rest of her party were also watching in shock as the metal creature ran off to the north.

∼

Edwyrd helped Gastropé get back to his feet. Gastropé looked around to realize there were now four oddly dressed orcs in the copse along with Damien, Vaselle, Antefalken and the D’Warg.

Gastropé shook his head. “I am not sure if I heard what I thought I heard,” he mumbled.

Edwyrd chuckled. “What did you think you heard?”

“I swear you said that you just took over Mount Doom, the seat of the demon Orcus,” Gastropé said.

Edwyrd made an odd expression with his mouth and bobbed his head up and down a few times.

“Yes, that is what he said,” one of the orcs agreed. “Lord Tommus is the long-prophesied reincarnation of the Great Orcus!”

“You see, he carries the Rod of Tommus, formerly called the Wand of Orcus,” one of the female orcs said.

It was very odd how these orcs spoke perfect trade, was about all Gastropé could think.

As Gastropé tried to collect his wits for his next question, an odd noise came from the south and east and an even odder voice shouted, “Do not close that portal!”

A metal man or something — a golem? — ran into the copse, heading straight for the portal. The odd metal creature suddenly stopped and stared at Edwyrd. Edwyrd, for once, appeared to be in as much surprise as Gastropé.

“If you have harmed so much as a hair, you will pay for all eternity, demon!” the metal creature announced sternly in a very loud voice before it turned and jumped through the still-open portal into the Abyss.

“What the hell was that?” the large male orc asked.

“I have no idea.” Edwyrd shook his head and stared worriedly through the portal.

Chapter 114

Talarius took a drink of water from his Flask of Holy Refreshment, washing down his cold roast ox sandwich. They really could use some condiments, or at least some cheese, the knight reflected. He, Boggy and Reggie were in the main dining hall, breaking their fast. Talarius had his helm sitting on the table beside him as he savored this simple return to old habits.