Prom Nights from Hell

"Oh. That makes a lot more sense. I can see that. See, I read it in this book about how to get guys to like you and they said it was a line that never failed but I got interrupted in the middle and the line before it was about china-not the country, the kind you eat off of-and that is where the fine part was but I must have gotten them confused." He just kept staring at her. She remembered the other advice from the book, "when in doubt, make an offer," reached out, grabbed the first thing she could put her hand on, held it up to his chin, and said, "Nuts?"

He looked like he was about to choke. He cleared his throat a few times, took the nuts from her, put the bowl back on the table, stepped toward her so that their noses were almost touching, and said, "You read a book about this?"

Miranda couldn't even hear his heartbeat over the sound of her own. "Yes, I did. Because clearly I wasn't doing it right. I mean, if you kiss a guy and he pulls away from you and looks at you like your skin just turned to purple slime, clearly you need to spend some time at the self-help section of-"

"You talk more when you're nervous," he said, still standing close to her.

"No I don't. That's absurd. I'm just trying to explain to you-"

"Do I make you nervous?"

"No. I'm not nervous."

"You're trembling."

"I'm cold. I'm wearing practically zero clothes."

His glance went to her lips, then back to her eyes. "I noticed."

Miranda gulped. "Look, I should-"

He caught her wrist before she could take off. "That kiss you gave me was the hottest kiss I've ever had. I pulled away because I was afraid I wouldn't be able to stop myself from ripping off your clothes. And that didn't seem like the right way to end a first date. I didn't want you to think that was all I was interested in."

She stared at him. There was silence again, but this time she didn't worry about how long it went on.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she said finally.

"I tried to, but every time I saw you afterward you disappeared. I got the feeling you were avoiding me."

"I didn't want things to be awkward."

"Yeah, there was nothing awkward about you hiding behind a plant when I came into the dining hall at lunch on Wednesday."

"I wasn't hiding. I was, um, breathing. You know, oxygen. From the plant. Very oxygenated, that air is."

Insert head in oven now.

"Of course. I should have thought of that."

"It's a health thing. Not many people know about it."

Leave until no longer HALF BAKED.

"No, I'm sure they-"

Miranda blurted. "Did you really mean that? About liking it when I kissed you?"

"I really did. A lot."

Her hands were shaking. She reached up and pulled him toward her.

Just as the music went off, the emergency-exit lighting went on and a tinny voice announced over a loudspeaker, "Please make your way to the nearest exit and leave the building immediately."

She and Will were pushed in different directions by the crowd surging to the door, being guided by four men in full body armor. The message kept repeating, but Miranda wasn't hearing it or Ariel West screaming that someone was going to PAY for RUINING her NIGHT or the person saying that dude, this was the sweetest way to end a prom ever, man, he was so high. She was hearing again the one-two-three cha-cha heartbeat of Deputy Reynolds, slightly muffled by body armor. This was no drill.

"It's us, isn't it?" Sibby said, rushing over to stand next to Miranda. "That's why those storm-trooper guys are here. For us."

"Yeah."

"You were right. I should have stayed hidden. This is my fault. I don't want anyone to get hurt. I'll just turn myself over to these people, and they'll have to let-"

Miranda interrupted her. "After all that? With only three hours left to go? And you, blend-it-like-butter girl? No way. It's not over. We can totally get out of this."

She tried to sound confident, but she was terrified. Just what do you think you're doing? U-Suck channel demanded.

I have no idea.

Sibby looked at her, eyes blazing with hope. "Do you mean it? You have a way out?"

Miranda swallowed, took a deep breath, and said to Sibby, "Follow me." To herself: Please don't fail.

Chapter Ten

It worked perfectly.

Almost. There were six guards blocking the exits and another four at the door, checking everyone as they left. Ten total. All in body armor and masks, explaining patiently that there had been a bomb threat and it was important to evacuate as quickly as possible. No one questioned why they were armed with the automatic weapons they kept using to push the crowd along.

No one except Dr. Trope, who went up to one of them and said, "Young man, I ask you to keep your weapons away from my students," distracting him just long enough for Miranda and Sibby to get swallowed into the middle of the crowd.

They'd navigated by the first two storm troopers, with only two left when Ariel yelled, "Dr. Trope? Dr. Trope? Look, there she is, Miranda Kiss. I told you she crashed the prom. She's right there in the middle. You have to-"