On the Wings of Hope : Prose

And do write down that history named for you we – men simple rural of the village Newworldish, Kirill and Mefodiy. But you us, please, with these letter-makers and azbukas-creators do not confuse, for many times were we blamed for it, for they say that we, apparently, invented this great and mighty Russian – we mean, chattering, foul one, yet did forget to add necessary and required words there, so men ours sometimes missed words these in their disputes greatly. And didn’t we invent it, yet only used ! Especially when all that property of our guys along with PPP have fallen down there, oh, how greatly have we used it – so that even invented new words precisely like Kirill and Mefodiy, yeah ! Well, so, looks like we got acquainted with each other a bit, told you of ourselves (especially that particular Kirill who have advised me to write down this particular story for particular future generations to be educated and advised).

So, believe us or not at all and check it all for yourself (but how could it be possible we don’t know, for all that PPP belongings of ours has been locked underground for several years by now, and thus are unable really to be a material evidence of sorts), but everything happened precisely as we are going to tell you here and now.

Living we were all in our Newwordish village, and knew neither the sadness nor the madness. To kids women of ours gave birth, and we together with them brought them up on mind, reason and chastity. Crops we collected plentiful, so that rye and wheat still remained for sale to nearby cities and towns. And cows ours in farms gave milk normally, and hens made eggs large, and sheep were full of fur, and cats exhausted mice completely. And relations with each other we had fine and harmonious – and such good that we didn’t even sweat between ourselves at all (well, unless, say, we take yet another bottle of moonshine on holidays and don’t share it among our men properly – for, yeah, in that case such wall-to-wall fights could take place that only whistle, ahs, ohs and dust to knees was carried throughout all the village, that’s right). Well, brothers, not a life it was, but a fairytale practically ! Yet didn’t we value that tranquility and peace seriously, and for real pennies for horrors other-worldly did we exchange them, and of that mistake we have been grieving still.

And here how the story goes. Somehow merchants overseas  arrived to us from Newdevilish village. And merchants they were because in clothes were they dressed unusual – men in some jackets black in color with canes and hats, and maids shameless with them in dresses short semi-transparent. And from Newdevilish village cause they said us so, even though we have heard of the village with such a name for the first time that time, and haven’t seen it with own eyes, thankfully. And why overseas ones they are we don’t know, for by the form their external and manners very strange we in our private circles so settled and decided afterwards. And also noted we and were surprised greatly that instead of horses habitual and common were their vehicles driven by pigs big, and no drivers did they have at all so these pigs mentioned could move them anywhere they had a whim of their own !

And so they all left their vehicles ruled by pigs, and started to call themselves with names unusual – Smiths, Bobs, Johns, Susans and Varvaras (pardon, Barbaras) and the like. Did say they that have already heard of the village our worthy, and therefore decided not to forget of us as well – and have arrived, thus, to look at us and study us. To learn our customs, as we understood it, and to adopt ones of their own in return. But turned it out, brothers, accurately according to a nipple system ! Imposed they did theirs customs harmful to us, and ours they derided and mocked  after, unfashionable and out-of-date them calling. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

They stopped at first in our local tavern for a week or so, so that they can, well, examine our village on “prospects of innovations”, as they decided to express themselves unclearly. And to pay off at first they wanted not with copper coins of ours that sound, but with some pieces of green paper with pyramids and eyes painted on them. Greatly were we surprised by such money, and didn’t want to accept them at first, but convinced they us naturally that always easy it is to exchange pieces of paper these with ugly faces of people on their reverse side drawn, for almost anything we desire, for the entire world is being bought and sold by them for these pieces. Ooh, didn’t scent we their dirty trick at that moment, stupid ones, for in calmness and tranquility of our world, until their arrival which have been remaining, very trustful we managed to become and didn’t think anything bad about visitors.