Lamentation

‘I wanted to live to see what would happen to you.’ He took a breath, winced with pain. ‘Together with your good friend the Queen.’

My eyes widened. All the inn knew that I had not worked for the Queen for a year. What could he know? ‘What are you talking about?’ I asked sharply, leaning over him. Bealknap gave me a look of satisfaction, then closed his eyes. I was angry now, realizing that he was playing games to the end. I shook him, but he had gone back to sleep and did not stir. I looked at him for a long moment. Then I could stand the terrible fug no longer; I was starting to feel sick. I went to the window and threw the shutters wide. The figure on the bed, now caught in full sunlight, lay white and wasted.

The door opened and the nurse came in. She went over to Bealknap, checked his breathing, then crossed to me, looking angry. ‘Master, what are you doing? He wants the shutters closed. If he finds you have opened them he will complain fiercely when he wakes. Please.’

I let Mistress Warren close the shutters again. She looked at Bealknap. ‘You must leave now, sir. Every effort tires him.’

‘There is something I need to ask him.’

‘Then return a little later. After lunch. Come now, please.’ She took my arm, and I let her lead me to the door. From the bed I heard a grunt, then another. Bealknap was dreaming, and from those sounds, not of anything pleasant.

I sat in my room in chambers, nursing a mug of small beer. I had been there for over an hour, trying to make sense of what Bealknap had said. Him, involved in all this? But how? He knew I once worked for the Queen, and must have heard the gossip that she was in trouble. But it was well known by everyone that I had stopped working for her a year ago. No, I thought, it is just that Bealknap knew that I had worked for Catherine Parr, knew she was in trouble as so many did, and hoped I might fall with her. I looked across the sunlit courtyard at the chamber where Bealknap lay. I would have to go over there again later, try to get more information from him. I shook my head. Vicious to the end. I thought of that great memorial Bealknap had planned; it would become a joke, a jest round Lincoln’s Inn. But he would not foresee that. He had always been blind in so many ways.

I heard the outer door of my chambers open, then close again. I had locked it when I came back; it must be Barak come in for something. I got up and opened the door. To my surprise I saw Nicholas taking papers from a table to his desk. His freckled face still looked tired, and there was a beer-stain on his robe. He stared at me.

‘Nicholas? Here on a Sunday?’

He looked a little shamefaced. ‘Some notes of cases came in yesterday from the Court of Requests, matters for the Michaelmas term. With your being busy, Barak asked me to summarize them. I was at the Inn for the service, and thought I might as well come in here and do some work.’ To my amusement he looked embarrassed at being caught out coming in to work extra hours. It did not fit with the image he liked to convey.

‘Nicholas,’ I said. ‘I was too sharp with you yesterday. You asked the apprentice Elias that question at the wrong time, and you must learn to judge more carefully. But — I should have made allowance for your youth, your inexperience. I apologize.’

He looked at me in surprise. ‘Thank you, sir.’

‘Are you getting a taste for the law?’

‘I confess at first I found it — well — boring, but now — it seems less so. There are some matters I find interesting.’

‘Most of all if a hunt for a murderer is involved, eh?’

He smiled. ‘Does that not add some spice?’

‘That is one way of putting it. The law is seldom so exciting, as you know. But it is necessary to see all aspects of it if you are to return to Lincolnshire and help manage your father’s lands.’

The boy’s face fell, the first time I had seen him look sad. ‘I doubt I will go back, sir.’

I realized how little I knew of Nicholas; he had volunteered almost nothing about himself. ‘How so?’ I asked.

He looked at me with his dark green eyes. ‘I was sent to law because my father disapproved of something I did.’ He hesitated. ‘Involving a proposed marriage.’

I nodded sympathetically. ‘You wished to marry someone below your station?’ I knew such cases were not uncommon.

Nicholas shook his head vigorously. ‘No, sir. I am of age, I may marry where I like.’ His eyes flashed with sudden anger, his chin jutting forward.

‘Of course,’ I soothed.

He hesitated. ‘As my father’s only son, the marriage I make is important. Our estates have suffered from the fall in money like so many, the value of our rents has fallen and the tenants can afford no more. A marriage to the wealthy daughter of a neighbouring estate would have brought a valuable dowry.’

‘Yes. I know such arrangements can be — difficult. What is it they say of gentlefolk? Marry first and learn to love later.’

Nicholas’s face brightened a little. ‘You understand, sir. Well, a marriage was planned for me, with the daughter of a large estate near our manor at Codsall.’