His blood pumped fast, eager to get him moving. He had time. He could mask his agitation well enough to see her taken care of. And once he was better, once the mystery was resolved, then he could talk to Hulda. Then he could tell her what he wanted to tell her. “Let me take you there.”
“It’s only three blocks.”
“Hulda—”
“I actually see Miss Steverus now.” She waved to someone in the distance. “Please,
Merritt’s gut clenched. His gaze shifted once more to the Oyster House. His brain nailed itself to that poster. “You’re sure? It’s no trouble.”
“Please. I would prefer it.”
The statement was like a dart burrowing into his chest, like he was drunk on laudanum and could only half feel it.
The concert poster seemed to pulse over her shoulder.
“But going home—”
“I’ll take a hired boat and have Myra see to me. I’m not incapable just because I’m a woman.”
He hesitated.
“Please.” She cleared her throat. “Or I’ll be late.”
Merritt sighed through his teeth. Why was he so cold? Or . . . maybe the cold wasn’t the reason he was shaking.
She patted her bag.
“Use it as soon as your dinner is done.” God help him, he was already losing it. “When you’re on the boat. On the island, and when you’re back at the house.”
She looked like she wanted to fight, but the cold was getting to her, too, judging by the reddening around her eyes. She nodded.
A headache was forming behind his forehead, amplifying his erratic pulse. “Thank you, Hulda.”
But she was already heading down the street, the ends of her shawl catching on the breeze.
Chapter 28
One of the hardest things Hulda had ever done was to sew up the guise of self-sufficient old maid and keep a straight face through her conversation with Merritt. Ignoring his obsession with that poster on the front of Quincy Market. Walking briskly to the docks, passing stranger after stranger. Acting as if her insides hadn’t been scooped out. And she did a bloody good job of it, too.
Until she got to the boat.
Once she activated the kinetic spell and propelled the boat into the bay, once she got far enough from the voices and city lights, her guise shattered completely.
She fumbled through her bag for a handkerchief, then hurriedly steered the boat where it needed to go, guided by the lighthouses on nearby islands. She’d thought—she had actually,
Her chest felt like it was cracking in two, like old, dry scabs were pulling apart fiber by fiber.
Because she had watched him drop everything to pursue another woman. An old love. A person he had intended to marry once. An accomplished musician, no less.
An intolerable sob worked its way up her throat. She was overreacting. She repeated that over and over, scolding herself like a grizzled headmaster would. It did nothing to quell her tears, which only frustrated her more.
She made it to Blaugdone Island with zero fanfare. Tried to pull on her mask again, but now that the proverbial dam had broken, it didn’t fit anymore. Like she was trying to shove a lamb shank into a sausage casing. At least the air was cold. That would help with the swelling and give her an excuse for the redness.
Tromping across the plashy ground, she paused once at a stirring sound, but it was only a grouse. She let herself into the house, purposefully ignoring the portrait on the wall. She could hear Mr. Babineaux moving about the kitchen. Rushing up the stairs, she darted for her room before Miss Taylor could witness her humiliation.