Journeys into the bright world

In the months following that regression session I could not help but think that probably those pies were the best investment Old Mary ever made.

A curious sidelight on this story is that virtually all the people associated with the unorthodox research projects sponsored by Ananta Foundation have lived one or more lives as renegades. Evidently the independence thereby cultivated was a necessary part of our training for the tasks we have elected to carry out, even though today we are all staunchly law-abiding citizens. It also seems notable that in his present life Howard has been an avid collector of knives and swords. Although not a specialist in surgery he is an expert with a scalpel as well as with the hypodermic needle. In Sherwood Forest he fashioned the weapons for the outlaw band. Now, as the spearhead of the ketamine research program, and one of the few who are legally permitted to give injections, he is still wielding a sharp pointed instrument for the sake of human liberation. In this respect, an astrologer would probably surmise that his soul selected a horoscope with Mars in Scorpio in the eighth house in order to carry on with a mode of operation which involves penetrating to the depths of things. This may involve physical cutting, or it may involve the psychological delving into and excising of problems which is a necessary part of the repetoire of a physician of souls.

Before Howard emerged from his meditative reverie we touched lightly upon a much earlier life as a Roman swordsman and charioteer. There was also a pathetically brief interlude about the time of World War I when he had been a young Armenian boy who was slaughtered by the Turks. Evidently it is necessary to be on both sides of the knife, just as to be on both sides of the law. It appeared that violence was not unusual in his soul's history. With all this training as a fighting man it was not surprising that when I recounted the story of my brush with the Canadian witches his first comment was, "If you had a doctor to protect you, this sort of incident might be less likely to occur."

Before leaving for Ojai I promised Howard that I would try to return sometime for a real visit. Meanwhile, I was scheduled to spend the remainder of August in Maine completing the two books with Mark Douglas, and the two weeks after that assisting Dr. Richard Willard, the president of Ananta Foundation, with his book on psychospiritual regeneration. Both these projects proceeded on schedule, but despite the unremitting effort involved, daily letters and mailgrams flew back and forth between Seattle and whatever part of the country I happened to be passing through.

Finally, we both determined that if our relationship was to be this intense we might as well become better acquainted. Coincidentally, Howard, who had been adrift since his divorce earlier that year, had received an offer to house-sit in a lovely home in a secluded area. At that point he sat down and wrote me a gracious invitation to attend a housewarming party for two in Seattle. Hence, on the eighteenth of September I was winging my way northward from California to "Sherwood Forest." It had been Howard's idea to bestow that name upon our temporary abode because of the manner in which the house nestled into a thickly wooded canyon with luxuriant green undergrowth and a bubbling stream.

The bliss of that pastoral idyll surpassed even my rosiest expectations and at the termination of our week in "Sherwood Forest" we celebrated our official engagement with a small party attended by Marwayne and Howard's best friend Heinz Mittelstadt. In retrospect it seems as though becoming engaged to someone with whom I had spent little more than a week was a daring step to take, though at the time it all seemed logical, sensible, and inevitable. Certainly our confidence in the Tightness of the decision was spurred by the fact that during my ten days in the Seattle area Howard and I took two spectacular mind trips together.

At this point in our narrative it seems to me to be of the utmost importance to make it clear that although ketamine has played an important role in our ever-deepening relationship, it was not the factor which brought us together or which has held us together. Our real concern with the therapeutic uses of this substance came only after our marriage. Our ketamine capers were not so much an impetus toward our union as a reward for the hard work and faith that had brought us to this place in our lives.