INVISIBLE
INKLING
EMILY JENKINS
ILLUSTRATIONS BY
HARRY BLISS
For Ivy—E.J.
For Sofi—H.B.
Contents
Secret Stuff, for Serious
The Fur Beneath the Sink
We Sounded Like Secret Agents
Attack of the French Bulldog
Not Actually a Big Round Pumpkin
Theft of Cheesy Goodness
Get Some Squash in That Thing
There Is No Partial Credit
The Invention of Wood Erk
Sprinkie Tax
The Big Fur Fluff-Up
The Squash Situation Becomes Desperate
I Am Not an Ambassador of Goodwill
Terror in the Aisles of Health Goddess
Invisible Blood
A New Plan
Land o’ Pumpkins
I Play a Mean Trick
Rampage
All Tomato Sauce and Anger
Little Dude, Don’t Bite
Destroy This Postcard
I Figured I’d Come for Lunch
About the Authors
Author’s Note
Copyright
About the Publisher
Secret Stuff, for Serious
Hi, you.
From
Hank Wolowitz
The Fur Beneath the Sink
A thing about me is, I have an overbusy imagination. Everyone says so.
And it’s true. I’m not saying I don’t.
I imagine airplanes that argue with their pilots, drinks that change the color of your skin, and aliens who study human beings in science labs—all when I’m supposed to be doing something else.
Like cleaning my room.
Or listening.
But here’s a thing about the invisible bandapat who’s been living in my laundry basket. He is
Inkling is as real as you, or me. Or the Great Wall of China.
I know that’s hard to believe. I could hardly believe it myself when I first met him.
My family is the Wolowitz family. We own an ice-cream shop a couple doors down from our apartment in Brooklyn, New York. The shop is called Big Round Pumpkin: Ice Cream for a Happy World.
The end of the summer before fourth grade, I’m hanging around the shop watching Mom, Dad, and Nadia set up for the day. That’s when I first notice the bandapat.
Mom is sweeping the stoop. Nadia is kneeling on the counter in a spangly purple skirt and enormous black boots, writing on the chalkboard. Dad has just finished churning a batch of his new fall flavor, white cherry white chocolate. He’s been making samples for a couple weeks, and now he’s got it good enough to sell to customers. That’s why Nadia is changing the flavor list that hangs over the counter.
A thing about my sister Nadia is, she has pretty handwriting.
A thing about me is, I have invented a lot of new ice-cream flavors.
Pepsi raisin chip.
Cotton-candy Gummi worm.
Poppy seed and waffle.
Sweet-potato pecan.
Don’t tell me what you think. I already know most people don’t like them.
My
Dad makes all the ice cream himself. He invented white cherry white chocolate, nectarine swirl, and Heath bar brownie. Mom invented chocolate-covered pretzel. Nadia made up cinnamon mocha and espresso double shot.
I have invented
Marshmallow peep.
Caramel popcorn.
Dried pineapple.
Cheddar-bunny crunch.
It
Chin from downstairs, my best friend Wainscotting, and I—we all three spent the rest of the afternoon barfing.
That’s why not Cheddar Bunnies.
Mom said could Dad please not waste time and resources making my weird ice-cream ideas any more. And he said okay.
After that, I stopped trying to help out in the shop so much. My sister works behind the counter on the weekends and in summer when it’s busy, but I’m too young, and no other job is as fun as inventing ice-cream flavors.