Down the Rabbit Hole

His heart climbed into his throat, deciding to pound furiously there and block his windpipe. Fearing he might faint, he grabbed for the chair in “his” cubicle and plopped into it. It rolled and struck the desk with its back. Jeremy planted his feet and put his head between his knees, breathing deeply. A sound like a computer booting up had him rising nearly as swiftly.

Suddenly, on what had been the plain gray fabric walls of his cube, appeared the same collection of screens he’d seen on the other people’s walls.

His eyes took in the sight, flicking from one to the other, and only a moment passed before he recognized what he was looking at. Apps! More specifically, smartphone apps. There were the calendar, settings, maps, messages, email, phone, web browser. The stock market. And then there were Redfin, Facebook, Twitter, TV Guide, NFL, Soccer, Tennis Channel—all the personal apps he had on his phone—and as he looked at them, they opened. He was controlling his iPhone with his mind! He looked around, wanting to tell someone, because this was freaking awesome. A mind-controlled smartphone!

But of course all those other people already knew it. No wonder they’d been too absorbed to hear him. Either that or they had literally been absorbed.

Was that what had happened? Had he been transported into the future, where—where what? He was his cell phone?

Novelty turned into nausea.

Then he remembered the words Macy had said just before standing up and dumping him: Someday you’re going to get sucked right into that thing and nobody will ever see you again.

*   *   *

Macy strode down the street, swallowing over the lump in her throat and blinking to stop tears from overflowing her eyelids. She paused and looked up at the sky, willing them back into her tear ducts even as another wave of regret washed over her.

She was crying, on the street, over a guy. What had become of her?

She remembered the first time she’d noticed the problem—or rather, noticed how big of a problem it was. She and Jeremy had taken a hike to the top of Sugarloaf Mountain. The air had been soft with summer’s last breath and the leaves were falling, crunching under their feet as they walked. They made it to the top, bursting out of the woods onto a rocky outcropping that showed nothing but rolling hills and a carpet of trees transitioning from green to orange, yellow and red. The breeze had kicked up, gently moving her hair from her forehead, and she’d gasped at the beauty before her, feeling as if the whole world was a magical place. It was a moment of such sublime happiness that she couldn’t think of another place on the planet she’d rather be.

This is it, she’d thought. This is the guy. This is what I’ve been searching for my whole life.

She’d turned to Jeremy, buoyant to be sharing it with him, convinced he had to be feeling it too, the profound connection, the certainty that this was something special, only to find him looking at his phone, thumb pushing screens aside, eyes riveted.

It struck her so hard, she couldn’t help it; she’d wanted to cry. She felt crushed. Had she fallen into the classic trap of believing that because she felt something, he did too? Was he here just to placate her? Was this the kind of moment, the kind of shared activity, that would disappear completely as the relationship aged? Would they end up at the same kitchen table inhabiting completely different worlds?

After a minute, perhaps sensing her silence, he looked up with an oblivious grin and said, “Can you believe it? I’ve got a signal up here!”

She’d turned away quickly, blinking back tears of disillusionment, and said something about the view, at which point he had joined her on the rock. But she could tell he wasn’t where she was, that he had no conception of the magic he had squelched.

By the time they’d gone to their respective homes, changed clothes and gotten back together for dinner that night she’d shaken most of it off, and the next morning he’d been charming at breakfast. Though he’d been checking work emails when she came downstairs, he’d put the phone down the moment he became aware of her.

“She’s alive!” he’d joked, and those sleepy gray eyes of his smiled. He wore a faded sweatshirt and well-worn jeans, his wavy hair tumbled wildly on his head like he hadn’t even glanced in a mirror, and she felt her heart lurch at the beauty of him.

She, on the other hand, had scrubbed her face, applied emergency makeup from her purse, and tried to casual-ize the outfit she’d worn the night before by going barefoot in her black skinny jeans and leaving her white shirt untucked.

“We’ve got to get you a pair of sweats to keep here,” he said, rising to wrap her in a good-morning hug.