Crowfeather's Trial

Crowfeather nodded, feeling the pain of rejection. He was glad that he had spoken, but he accepted that he could not control how his son responded. I guess Lionblaze and Jayfeather will always resent me.

“I’m not angry with you,” Lionblaze added. “I accept your apology, and I’m grateful for the way it all turned out.”

A little reassured, Crowfeather dipped his head again in acceptance. He began reaching out his tail to touch Lionblaze on the shoulder, then hastily drew it back again as he realized that would never be their relationship. This cordial agreement, with the air cleared between them, was the best he could hope for. And I have to learn to be okay with that.

Part of Crowfeather was sad at the thought of what might have been, but mostly he was filled with relief that he and Lionblaze had reached an understanding. It felt like a cool shower of rain in a dry season.

For a brief moment, Crowfeather wondered what his life would have been like if he and Leafpool had never returned to their Clans. They would have found a place to live happily, with Lionblaze and Jayfeather and Hollyleaf, and maybe many other kits. But then Crowfeather pushed the vision away. All three of their kits would have been different if he and Leafpool had raised them together, and he guessed that in the end Leafpool’s love of her Clan would have drawn her back to her calling as a medicine cat. The knowledge hurt, but everything had happened as it was meant to. And Crowfeather felt humbled that Lionblaze had forgiven him.

Crowfeather and Lionblaze caught up to the rest of the patrol as they emerged from the tunnels, blinking in the sunlight that seemed dazzling after so long in the dark. Harespring, who had been leading the patrol, bounded up to Onestar.

“The tunnels are clear of stoats,” he reported.

“And it’s time we were leaving,” Squirrelflight added, gathering the ThunderClan cats together with a wave of her bushy tail. “Let us know if you have any more trouble.”

“I’m sure we won’t,” Onestar meowed, with a respectful dip of his head. “The stoats are gone, and we couldn’t have achieved that without your help. Please take the thanks of WindClan to Bramblestar.”

Squirrelflight nodded, equally respectful. “I will. And may StarClan light your path.”

“And yours,” Onestar responded.

Crowfeather watched as Squirrelflight led the ThunderClan cats away toward the border. Warm satisfaction filled him at the thought that their two Clans had worked together, along with hope that they could rely on each other in the future. As they went, he caught Nightcloud’s eye and saw that she was looking calm and approving.

In the past she had always been angry and contemptuous of ThunderClan, never losing a chance to quarrel with them or accuse them of overstepping. For the first time, Crowfeather realized that so much of that had been because of him.

It must have been hard for her, he thought as he and the rest of the WindClan cats headed for their camp, knowing that for so long my heart lay across that border. Maybe now she won’t be so angry. And maybe in future the Clans can finally learn to get along in peace.

Chapter 32

An icy wind swept across the moor, buffeting Crowfeather’s fur as he stood watching his apprentice. Featherpaw had picked up the scent of a rabbit where it crouched in a clump of long grass, and now she chased it up the hill, her muscles bunching and stretching as she gradually gained on her quarry. His heart warmed to see her speed and strength, as if she had never been injured.

The rabbit doubled back, and without a heartbeat’s hesitation Featherpaw changed direction, not chasing the rabbit anymore, but seeming to know instinctively where it would run. She leaped on it with outstretched paws; Crowfeather heard the rabbit’s squeal of terror, abruptly cut off as Featherpaw killed it by biting its throat.

He waited for his apprentice as she trotted back to him, her prey dangling from her jaws. “Was that okay?” she asked, her eyes shining as she dropped the rabbit in front of him.

“No, it wasn’t okay,” Crowfeather meowed, then added quickly before Featherpaw had time to look disappointed, “It was magnificent. Well done!”

Featherpaw blinked up at him happily. “It’s your catch really,” she purred. “You’re such a great mentor!”

Crowfeather felt a tingle of satisfaction in his paws, reflecting that even though he hadn’t been the best father when his kits were growing up, he was at least a good mentor now. Maybe that can make up for my other failings…

“We’d better head back,” he meowed, picking up the rook he had caught earlier and leading the way down the hill and into the camp.