Class Dis-Mythed

"Congratulations, Melvine," she said, patting him on the head. "You are a very interesting person. I have been watching you since the contest began. Your audacity and confidence interest me. I don't like yes-men, and I don't like people who can't think for themselves. Therefore, I am giving you an assignment that will be a challenge. I'm making you the Chief Executive Officer of one of my favorite business enterprises, Brandex!"

I joined the audience in a general gasp. Who hadn't heard of Brandex? It manufactured a little of everything you could find in almost every store in every dimension I'd ever been. Most small magikal goods probably had "Brandex" imprinted somewhere. They weren't necessarily the top of the line, but they were fairly sound and usually cheap to buy.

"I'm putting you into a position of authority with full hiring and firing power. You'll have some tough decisions to make. You're expected to make a profit, of course. What do you say?"

"Can I hire my own executive staff?" Melvine asked at once.

The great lady laughed, and the audience joined in, urged by Schlein and the fireflies.

"Of course," she said. "Why do you ask?"

Melvine looked uncharacteristically modest. "Well, maybe you didn't notice, but I'm not the natural leader of my team. Jinetta is. I only won by a stroke of luck. I'm not the best researcher like Pologne, or the best magician in the group like Freezia. I'll never be as courageous or organized as Bee or as compassionate as Tolk. In fact, if you rolled them together, you'd have a much better CEO than you'd get out of me. That's the truth. I want them on my team. I'd never have gotten here if not for all of them. If I can't have them," his face screwed up as if he was about to start crying, "I don't want the job."

"Of course you may hire them," Mistress Montestruc said. "I will be pleased to have such talented people on my payroll."

Melvine sighed, and his shoulders slumped. "That's a relief."

The shoulders, and his head, continued to drop downward.

"What is happening to him?" the lady cried. "He is shrinking!"

Markie burst through the crowd to hug her nephew.

"You did it!" She hugged him. "You must have broken the mental block that was keeping you a big baby. You're normal size again!"

Melvine looked down at himself. He stood about two and a half feet tall, much more in proportion to his looks than he had at four feet. His new, tiny body swam in the jumpsuit.

"Yeah!" he cheered, jumping up to punch the sky. "I'm the Cupy! I'm the Cupy!"

Reporters crowded in to interview the winner. Melvine floated up to hover over their heads in the oversized garment, cracking jokes and generally basking in the attention. Markie stayed nearby to keep an eye on him.

The magicians stepped back to view the Geek as he came over to shake hands with the All-Pervects. We followed him out onto the arena floor.

"Sorry you didn't manage to achieve a victory on home soil," he told them. His face was full of genuine regret. I was willing to bet it was for the lost bets, not the disappointed Pervects. "But you know, there's only one prize on Sink or Swim. Thanks for playing."

"Yeah, thanks a lot," Crasmer said shortly. "Come on, guys. Let's go get drunk."

"Yeah."

"And there they go, your home team!" Schlein announced, as a spotlight hit them.

Not bothering to turn around to acknowledge the cheers and applause, the, All-Pervects stamped off the stage.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

"I think it's time to leave." LOUIS XIV

The Sorcerer's Apprentices came over to where Bunny, Markie, Tananda and I stood. Jinetta stood on tiptoe to give me a big kiss on the cheek.

"Gosh, thanks for everything, Mr. Aahz. You're fantastic. And your partner is the best. I wish we could tell him how grateful we are" she added.

"Uh-huh." I couldn't miss the meaning. "I, uh, I see that Tolk told you."

Jinetta grinned down at the Canidian, who was leaning against my leg. "He did. We all hope you aren't upset that we didn't tell you why we needed your help."

"Not any longer. I have to admit, when I found out you had come here, I was a little upset that you didn't tell me about the contest."

"Well, with all the ordeals you were putting us through, we all thought you knew," Jinetta said, surprised. "I thought you were totally savvy. Was it all by accident?"

"Er—yes," I admitted, a little unhappily. "I didn't connect the time frame with the beginning of the new SOS contest. I just thought you really wanted some practical experience before you went into the business world. Using ideas I scooped from some of the Crystal Ether network was pure coincidence."

Jinetta and the others looked more admiring than ever.

"It takes a big soul to admit that," she said. "You could have lied and told us you did know. I like your honesty. No wonder Aunt Vergetta thinks you're the spink's left nostril. Wait until I tell her! You're a terrific teacher, Skeeve." She crushed me in an enormous hug. The others followed suit, leaving me gasping.