Adrift on the Nile

"I'll kill him before he kills me!" yelled Ragab. But they pushed him toward the door in spite of his resistance. More and more violently, he tried to free himself from them, and more and more doggedly did they prevent him, until there was almost a battle going on among them. He threatened to hit them if they did not leave him, and they in their turn threatened him likewise.

Anis watched the scene amazed. They were wrestling with each other. The beast wanted to kill. Desperately they tried to push him, and he could not overcome them.

Suddenly he desisted. He stood there, motionless, panting. Then he collapsed into a fury. Insanity gleamed in his eyes. "You think I alone am responsible!" he yelled.

"Leave the talking until we are off the boat."

"You fled with me!"

"We'll talk quietly outside."

"No, you bastards!" Ragab cried. "I am going myself! I will go to the police myself, and nothing will stand in my way--not ruin, death, or demons!"

And he rushed out, the other men at his heels. Saniya and Layla immediately followed them. The boat rocked and shook convulsively under heavy, angry feet.

Anis put the knife on the table and went over to the nearest mattress, where he sat down, not far from Samara. They both gazed out at the night, giving themselves up to solitary silence. They did not exchange a look or a word. The earth itself has quaked, he thought. Almost split apart. He became aware of the approach of familiar footsteps. He did not turn his head until the old man was standing behind him. "They have gone," he said.

Anis did not reply. Amm Abduh spoke again. "The devil had his fill of fun with you tonight." Anis did not break his silence. "I have brought the coffee," said Amm Abduh.

Anis fingered his jaw. "Leave it in front of me," he said.

"Drink it right away, from someone who wishes you well. It will soothe the pain." And Amm Abduh lifted the cup to Anis' mouth for him to sip. "Let it be for your good health this time," said Amm Abduh. Then he retreated, but at the door he paused. "I had made up my mind to break the moorings if he hit you again!" he said.

"But I would have drowned along with all the others!" Anis replied, astonished.

"At least there is protection in the Lord," said Amm Abduh as he left.

Anis laughed faintly. "Did you hear what the old man said?" he asked Samara.

"Do you not think we should call a doctor?" she asked in turn.

"No, no. No need for that."

Talking about it stirred up the pain again, but it was trifling now that the coffee had settled in his stomach.

"Will he really go to the police?" Samara asked.

"I have no idea what is happening outside," he replied.

She hesitated a little before saying: "What made you . . . ?" And then she stopped short. He had grasped her meaning, but he did not reply.

"Was it anger?" she asked.

"Perhaps."

"Perhaps?"

He smiled. "I also wanted to put it to the test--saying what should be said, that is."

She thought for a moment. "Why?" she asked.

"I don't know exactly. Perhaps to examine the effect."

"And how did you find it?"

"As you saw."

"Are you really going to inform the police if Ragab does not do it?"

"You don't want that!"

She sighed. "It all got beyond me. I was defeated."

"But the experience proved that it is possible?"

"But it appears that you will not follow it through to the end."

"I haven't the reasons that you have for that!"

"Now you're killing me all over again!"

He was silent for a while. Then he said: "You love him. Is that not so?"

She took refuge in silence and pretended to be unaware that he was waiting for her to speak.

"Have you found him different from the excellent man you refused before?" he said next.

"I see you still have your fighting spirit!" she said plaintively.

"There is nothing to be ashamed of, if you have found him different. He's still an excellent man. . . ."

"But he has no morals!"

"They no longer exist. Not even for Ahmad Nasr."

"I'd like to call you a pessimist, but I have no right."

"At any rate, their amorality will protect them from committing any moral stupidity. And you will come to love again!"

"Torment me all you like; I deserve it, and more."

He laughed, and laughter made him feel the pain in his jaw. "I have a confession to make," he said, "which is that jealousy was one of the motives for my strange behavior!"

She stared at him in astonishment. He smiled, and continued: "It would not be right to deceive you. You might have imagined that one of the characters of your play had developed to its opposite extreme through the influence of your words--or by hard experience. And that would land you with a false ending."

She was still staring in amazement. "There is another ending," he continued, "no less trite than that--which is that you love me back."

She lowered her eyes. "And how do you see the ending?" she asked.

"That is our problem," he replied, "not simply a problem of the play."

"But you spoke earlier of 'saying what had to be said'!"