A Small Gray Dot

I checked with my credit union and the first scheduled amount wasn’t there. This was worrying. Since I had planned to be on my honeymoon instead of in the city, I hadn’t taken on any of the part-time work I usually did to supplement my summer pay, such as tutoring or working as a lifeguard at one of the public pools, and none of those jobs were available at the moment. That was one reason why I was looking at want-ads.

Most of the cash Zoni and I put away had already been paid out for the wedding and honeymoon that would never happen, and there was no way to get the money back. I had a little left in savings because in addition to setting aside funds for our wedding and honeymoon, we were also able to tuck away a little for a down payment on a condo. The royalties from my book went into that.

Of course, until the week before the world went slipping off into a deep pile, those royalties hadn’t been a lot and with things gone to hell, they would likely stop.

Then, the same day I got the news about my summer salary, local government announced they were delaying the opening of school. That was another reason I was looking at the want-ads. Maybe I would eventually get the money from my summer account, but I didn’t have it yet, and I was going to need a way to feed myself and keep my apartment until the schools reopened.

There were fewer people to look for jobs but there were also fewer employers so the jobs section was sparse and, so far, no luck.

I could see Will had made up his mind and was determined to go. In spite of my misgivings, I didn’t blame him. Had my parents been in Jamaica I would’ve been anxious to get there, too.

“When did you and Tremaine want to leave?”

“The weekend. I don’t see any reason for putting it off any longer.” He peered at me. “You wanna go with us?”

I studied him. I thought about my sister and her husband from whom I’d still not heard, and considered that perhaps I should go with them. But then I factored in that if I went, I would have to remain in Jamaica until I found work to earn enough to return because the money I had might get me there, but it wouldn’t last long and it wouldn’t be enough to get me back.

As much as I loved visiting Jamaica, it wasn’t my home. I was born here and I didn’t want to have to stay there, especially in these times. Will, on the other hand had fond memories of living on the island since he was born there and only came to the U.S. with his parents when he was ten. His ties there were stronger than mine and he likely wouldn’t mind having to stay there for a while.

There was another factor. A couple of days before, I contacted the police department and explained that I’d buried my parents and fiancée in the backyard of my parents’ home. From their reaction, it appeared my case wasn’t unique because they were sympathetic and understanding, and they assured me that I wasn’t in trouble for having done what I did.

They advised me that ordinarily they’d send someone around and it would be a matter for the medical examiner’s office but at the moment, they and everyone else were overwhelmed. I could either leave them buried where they were or if I wanted them moved, I could contact a funeral home and let them handle it.

I simply couldn’t leave Zoni and my parents buried in the back yard in four-foot graves, so I found a funeral home, and now had an appointment to go in the next week to arrange to get them dug up and put into coffins and reburied in a proper cemetery.

I knew it would take most of my small savings and perhaps it was foolish of me to use up much needed cash to get them moved, but it was a thing I had to do, though, if I’d known about Will’s plans, I might’ve waited. I wanted to find my sister but I needed to finish what I’d begun before I made any other plans.

Hoping I could get him to delay his trip, I said, “Lowell will let me use his phone, Will. I’ll see if I can reach the U.S. Embassy in Kingston. Maybe they can help locate them.” Lowell, my landlord and now my friend, had a landline and was good about sharing it with me.

He looked thoughtful then he nodded. “Since land lines still work then overseas lines probably do, too.” He shrugged. “Won’t hurt to check.”

We went down to the smoke shop and Lowell took us back up to his apartment where he kept his computer. He had a DSL connection and I looked up the embassy number and dialed it. But, either the lines were down or more likely they were getting many such calls, and I could never get through.

Sighing after I hung up from my latest try, I said, “If you will wait until the end of August, I’ll go with you but there’s something else I have to do first.” I needed to get a job as fast as possible and work at least a month so I’d have some extra cash.

But he was shaking his head. “I’m supposed to start my freshman year in college in the fall and if I don’t go now I may not make it back by then.”

“Let me try again tomorrow. Maybe I’ll have better luck.”