A Million Thoughts: Learn All About Meditation from a Himalayan Mystic

After hearing many confessions, the young one asked his mentor if he had done it right. The bishop said that much was lacking. He agreed to do a demonstration. This time the bishop heard the confessions while the young priest sat quietly observing. After everyone was done, the bishop said to the priest, “Now don’t you think that saying ‘uh-oh’, ‘I see’, ‘please continue’, ‘it’s okay my child’, ‘carry on’ is better than slapping your knee and saying ‘cool, what happened next!’”

Empathy is about listening quietly so you may gauge the extent of the other person’s grief. Telling them to be strong or that they are overreacting is the worst form of empathy. In fact, even worse is when we say something like, “That’s nothing. Listen to what happened to me the other day.”

The most important thing to remember about all the virtues is that they are not merely emotions, they are behavior. We don’t always have to feel compassionate or empathic to show those emotions. A good meditator inching towards divinity can adopt a behavior that shows compassion and empathy.

You don’t have to feel a certain way to act a certain way.

The reverse is more practical and effective; start acting a certain way and you’ll start feeling that way. Empathy is an act before it becomes an emotion. It is, however, not possible to develop a sense of empathy without being sensitive towards others around us. In fact, it’s hard to practice any virtue without having a degree of sensitivity. If you observe those who act most selfishly, often you’ll discover that it’s not that they are bad or ignoble, they just lack sensitivity.

A young student was taking a walk with a professor who was known for his kindness. As they went along, they saw a coat and a pair of old shoes lying in the path. These chattels belonged to a poor man who was employed in a field close by and had nearly finished his day’s work.

The student turned to the professor, and said: “Let us play a prank: we will hide his shoes and conceal ourselves behind those bushes. It will be fun to wait and see his perplexity when he can’t find them.”

“I don’t think we should amuse ourselves at the expense of the other person,” the professor replied. “Rather than hiding his shoes, let’s put a coin into each shoe instead, and then we will hide ourselves and watch how the discovery affects him.”

The student did so and they both went behind the bushes close by. The poor man soon finished his work and came across the field to the path where he had left his belongings. While putting on the coat he slipped his foot into one of the shoes but feeling something hard, pulled it out to check the shoe. Astonishment seized him when he found a coin in his shoe. He gazed upon the coin, turned it round, and examined it again and again. He looked around him on all sides, but nobody was to be seen.

Putting the money in his pocket, he proceeded to put on the other shoe only to go through the same fate. Completely overwhelmed, he fell upon his knees, looked up to the skies and said aloud a fervent thanksgiving in which he spoke of his sick and helpless wife and his children without bread, whom the timely bounty, from some unknown hand, would help him feed his family.

“Now,” said the professor, “are you not more pleased than if you had played your intended trick?”

“Thank you, professor,” the student said. “Today, I’ve understood what it really means when they say, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”

You can’t be a giving person unless you develop sensitivity. You can give someone grief or you can give them joy, it all depends on how sensitive you are towards them, their lives, their needs. So often, we take the presence of others in our life for granted. We joke around, we make fun, we share laughter. All of which is okay but when we do so insensitively, we don’t just hurt them but we hurt our own existence too. The spiritual being in us takes a hit when we choose to be insensitive.

A good meditator is always mindful of his thoughts, actions and words. One of the most beautiful rewards of meditation is that it makes you more sensitive. It’s a natural by-product. You feel what others are feeling around you.

The more spiritual you are, the more sensitive you will be. Empathy, love, compassion and charity come naturally to a sensitive person. Sensitivity is knowing the difference between being emphatic and being empathic. As they say, resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant with the weak and wrong. Sometime in your life, you will have been all of these.

Humility

Legend has it that the king of Kazakhstan sent his royal messenger to the emperor of India, Jalal ud-din Muhammad Akbar, with three profound questions. Akbar’s navaratna, nine jewels, were nine people of extraordinary talents. Known for his wit and wisdom, one of them was Birbal. The king wanted to hear the answers in person so, Birbal was seen off to deliver the same.